As burglar's shops and houses do, To find out where they'd best break through. 70 Physicians valu'd fame and wealth Above the drooping patient's health, Or their own skill: the greatest part Study'd, instead of rules of art, Grave pensive looks and dull behaviour, 75 To gain th' apothecary's favour; The praise of midwives, priests, and all That serv'd at birth or funeral. To bear with th' ever-talking tribe, And hear my lady's aunt prescribe; 80 With formal smile, and kind how d'ye, To fawn on all the family; And, which of all the greatest curse is, T' endure th' impertinence of nurses. Among the many priests of Jove, 85 Hir'd to draw blessings from above, Some few were learn'd and eloquent, But thousands hot and ignorant: Yet all pass'd muster that could hide Their sloth, lust, avarice and pride; 90 For which they were as fam'd as tailors For cabbage, or for brandy sailors, Some, meagre-look'd, and meanly clad, Would mystically pray for bread, Meaning by that an ample store, 95 Yet lit'rally received no more; And, while these holy drudges starv'd, The lazy ones, for which they serv'd, Indulg'd their ease, with all the graces Of health and plenty in their faces. 100 The soldiers, that were forc'd to fight, If they surviv'd, got honour by't; Though some, that shunn'd the bloody fray, Had limbs shot off, that ran away: Some valiant gen'rals fought the foe; 105 Others took bribes to let them go: Some ventur'd always where 'twas warm, Lost now a leg, and then an arm; Till quite disabled, and put by, They liv'd on half their salary; 110 While others never came in play, And staid at home for double pay. Their kings were serv'd, but knavishly, Cheated by their own ministry; Many, that for their welfare slaved, 115 Robbing the very crown they saved: Pensions were small, and they liv'd high, Yet boasted of their honesty. Calling, whene'er they strain'd their right, The slipp'ry trick a perquisite; 120 And when folks understood their cant, They chang'd that for emolument; Unwilling to be short or plain, In any thing concerning gain; For there was not a bee but would 125 Get more, I won't say, than he should; But than he dar'd to let them know, That pay'd for't; as your gamesters do, That, though at fair play, ne'er will own Before the losers that they've won. 130 But who can all their frauds repeat? The very stuff which in the street They sold for dirt t' enrich the ground, Was often by the buyers found Sophisticated with a quarter 135