"Alas! there is so absurdly little to tell," Iglesias answered, "that,
here and now, in face of my existing sense of life and of vision, I am
humbled by my own ignorance and poverty of achievement. That poverty, I
suppose, is all the more apparent to me, because twice to-day I have
been--so I judge, at least--within measurable distance of bidding
farewell to this astonishingly wonderful world and the fashion of it.
It comes home to me how little I have seen, how little I have profited,
how little I know. I would have liked to leave it; it would be more
seemly to do so, having profited more largely by my sojourn here."
Iglesias paused, excitement which his natural sobriety disapproved
gaining him, too, through that ache of unrealised beauty. For a moment
he struggled with it as with a rising tide, then resigned himself.
"And yet," he added, "in other respects I should not be sorry to hear
the hour strike, for curiosity of the unknown is very strong in me.
Opportunity may have been narrow, and one may have been balked of high
endeavour and rich experience, by lack of talent and by adverse
circumstances; but in the supreme, the crowning experience, that of
death and all which, for joy or sorrow, lies beyond it, even the most
obscure, the most uncultured and untravelled must participate."
"Don't be in too great a deuce of a hurry to satisfy that curiosity,
dear man," Poppy put in. "You must contrive to exercise patience for a
little while yet, please; always remembering that it is entirely
superfluous to run to catch a train which is bound not to start until
you are on board of it. And then, too, you see--well, there's me, after
all, and I want you."
Iglesias' face grew keen, as he looked at her through that encompassing
whiteness of moonlight.
"I am glad of that," he said very quietly, "because you are to me, dear
friend, what no other human being has ever yet been. The saddest thing
that could happen to me, save loss of faith, would be that you should
cease to want me. I only pray God, if it is not self-seeking, that you
may continue to want me as long as I live."
"But your religion?" she asked, a point of jealousy pricking her.
"My religion forbids sin, whether of body or mind; forbids violation of
the eternal spiritual proportion, by any placing of the creature before
the Creator in a man's action or in his heart. But my religion enjoins
love and stimulates it; since only through loving can we fulfil the
highest possibility of our nature, which is to grow into the likeness
of Almighty God."
"You believe that?" Poppy asked again.
"I do more," Iglesias said. "I know it."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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