The Fashionable Adventures of Joshua Craig: A NovelPhillips, David Graham
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The Fashionable Adventures of Joshua Craig: A Novel
Phillips, David Graham
Adventure stories; Fiction
"How little that amounts to! All human beings--Grant, you, I, all of us,
everybody--are brimful of vanity. It slops over a little one way and we
call it like. It slops over the other way and we call it
dislike--hate--loathing--according to the size of the slop. Now, I'm not
here to deal with vanity, but with good sense. Has it occurred to you in
the last few days that you and I have got to get married, whether we
will or no?"
"It has not," she cried with frantic fury of human being cornered by an
ugly truth.
"Oh, yes, it has. For you are a sensible woman--entirely too sensible
for a woman, unless she marries an unusual man like me."
"Is that a jest?" she inquired in feeble attempt at sarcasm.
"Don't you know I have no sense of humor? Would I do the things I do and
carry them through if I had?"
In spite of herself she admired this penetration of self-analysis. In
spite of herself the personality beneath his surface, the personality
that had a certain uncanny charm for her, was subtly reasserting its
inexplicable fascination.
"Yes, we've got to marry," proceeded he. "I have to marry you because I
can't afford to let you say you jilted me. That would make me the
laughing-stock of my State; and I can't afford to tell the truth that I
jilted you because the people would despise me as no gentleman. And,
while I don't in the least mind being despised as no gentleman by
fashionable noddle-heads or by those I trample on to rise, I do mind it
when it would ruin me with the people."
Her eyes gleamed. So! She had him at her mercy!
"Not so fast, young lady," continued he in answer to that gleam. "It is
equally true that you've got to marry me."
"But I shall not!" she cried. "Besides, it isn't true."
"It IS true," replied he. "You may refuse to marry me, just as a man may
refuse to run when the dynamite blast is going off. Yes, you can refuse,
but--you'd not be your grandmother's granddaughter if you did."
"Really!" She was so surcharged with rage that she was shaking with it,
was tearing up her handkerchief in her lap.
"Yes, indeed," he assured her, tranquil as a lawyer arguing a commercial
case before a logic-machine of a judge. "If you do not marry me all your
friends will say I jilted you. I needn't tell you what it would mean in
your set, what it would mean as to your matrimonial prospects, for you
to have the reputation of having been turned down by me--need I?"
She was silent; her head down, her lips compressed, her fingers fiercely
interlaced with the ruins of her handkerchief.
"It is necessary that you marry," said he summing up. "It is wisest and
easiest to marry me, since I am willing. To refuse would be to inflict
an irreparable injury upon yourself in order to justify a paltry whim
for injuring me."
She laughed harshly. "You are frank," said she.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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