New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Women -- Suffrage -- United States -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
It was an exciting three days. I had never spent a night in quite such
splendid surroundings; I had never mingled with quite such smart and
fashionable people. It was like a play to me. I hoped I would not forget
my lines, fail to observe cues, or perform the necessary business
awkwardly. I wanted to do credit to my host. And I believe I did. Within
two hours I felt at ease in the grand and luxurious house. The men were
older, the women more experienced, but I wasn't uncomfortable. As I
wandered through the beautiful rooms, conversed with what to me stood
for American aristocracy, basked in the hourly attention of butlers and
French maids, it occurred to me that I was peculiarly fitted for such a
life as this. It became me. It didn't seem as if I could be the little
girl who not so very long ago lived in the old French-roofed house with
the cracked walls, stained ceilings and worn Brussels carpets, at 240
Main Street, Hilton, Mass. But the day Breck asked me to marry him I
discovered I was that girl, with the same untainted ideal of marriage,
too, hidden away safe and sound under my play-acting.
"Why, Breck!" I exclaimed. "Don't be absurd. I wouldn't _marry_ you for
anything in the world."
And I wouldn't! My marriage was dim and indistinct to me then. I had
placed it in a very faraway future. My ideal of love was such, that
beside it all my friends' love affairs and many of those in fiction
seemed commonplace and mediocre. I prized highly the distinction of
Breckenridge Sewall's attentions, but marry him--of course I wouldn't!
Breck's attentions continued spasmodically for over two years. It took
some skill to be seen with him frequently, to accept just the right
portion of his tokens of regard, to keep him interested, and yet remain
absolutely free and uninvolved. I couldn't manage it indefinitely; the
time would come when all the finesse in the world would avail nothing.
And come it did in the middle of the third summer.
Breck refused to be cool and temperate that third summer. He insisted on
all sorts of extravagances. He allowed me to monopolize him to the
exclusion of every one else. He wouldn't be civil even to his mother's
guests at Grassmere. He deserted them night after night for Edith's
sunken garden, and me, though I begged him to be reasonable, urging him
to stay away. I didn't blame his mother, midsummer though it was, for
closing Grassmere, barring the windows, locking the gates and abruptly
packing off with her son to an old English estate of theirs near
London. I only hoped Mrs. Sewall didn't think me heartless. I had always
been perfectly honest with Breck. I had always, from the first, said I
couldn't marry him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account