As he considered these things, the emphasis shifted from "believe" to
the Person in whom to believe; and it seemed to him that the teaching
must be not so much that faith was in itself a way of salvation, as
that it was a simple necessity to the taking of the Way--the One sent
forth from God; in short, that its own value was purely relative to the
One believed in. This seemed to settle a very important question, and
drew the sceptic's attention away from his own capabilities of belief
to the claims of the proposed object of his faith. He read His words
with an interest that was painfully intense, and almost groaned his
prayerful longing to know if they were true.
"After all," thought he, "be a man credulous or doubting, absolute
knowledge waits upon revelation--upon demonstration."
"O God," he cried finally, "if Thou art, and if Jesus Christ is, and is
such an One as described here, give me evidence! Let me know Him and
Thee."
He lifted his book again, and this time he read:
"If any man is willing to do his will, he shall know of the teaching,
whether it be of God, or whether I speak from myself."
If a voice had spoken aloud the words it would not have conveyed the
message more directly to his heart. He paused, as before a pivotal
moment of destiny.
"'Willing to do His will!'"
His face whitened. The agony of the night before was upon him. The
way of the cross--the picture of the Man who like no other had done the
will of God, rose before him and demanded all things.
As drowning men are said to have pass in review the events of a
lifetime before them, so in a moment's time the strategic elements of
his life appeared before him, and the finger of God pressed the most
sensitive points in his nature. He pointed to the counting room of the
keen business man, and Hubert saw himself poor for the Kingdom of God's
sake. He pointed to the beautiful home and its inmates, and he saw
himself homeless, having "hated" father and mother and sister--ah,
sharpest pang of all!--for the sake of discipleship to the sorrowful
Son of Man. An invisible attraction drew him after Him, and with ashen
lips but with fixed heart Hubert Gray took up his cross.
"I am willing to do Thy will," he said. "Only let me know the
teaching."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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