Bildungsromans; Norway -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
Then she heard Odegaard's voice down stairs with the mother, heard that
he was being directed the way to her room; he had come to fetch her! A
feeling of bashful joy took hold of her, she looked round to see if all
was in order for him; then she went to the door. "Come in!" she
answered softly to the low tap, and stepped back a little.
As an icy shower over her, as if the earth gave way beneath her, was
the impression of the face that met her in the door! She staggered back
to get hold of the bed-post; her thoughts slipped from one abyss to
another; in less than a second she had fallen from earth's happiest
bride to its greatest sinner; she heard it thunder out of that face: in
time and eternity he could not forgive her!
In scarcely audible tones he whispered: "I see it, you are guilty!" He
leaned against the door and held fast to the lock, as if without that
he could not stand. His voice trembled; the tears rolled down his face,
though his countenance was perfectly calm.
"Do you know what you have done?" and his eyes crushed her to the
earth. She did not answer,--did not even weep; she was paralysed by a
complete and hopeless inability,--"Once before, I gave my heart away,
and he to whom I gave it, died through my fault. I could not rise above
this sorrow, unless one should reach over me and give me the wealth of
a whole heart again. This you have done,--and you have done it
hypocritically!" He stopped: two or three times he tried in vain to
begin again, then with a sudden pang of pain: "And all that I have
stored up during these years, thought upon thought, you have had the
heart to overturn as though it were an image of clay! Child, child,
could you not understand that I was building up myself in you? Now it
is past! Can you not now comprehend it: all that I have given, the very
warmest, the very depths of my heart, lost as flame in the winter air,
no token left?--Who are you, unhappy child?--I believed you to be my
most sacred treasure, but alas; you are more than profaned!"--He wept
in the bitterness of his grief.
"No, you are too young to comprehend it," he said again; "you know not
what you have done.--But yet you must understand," he exclaimed, "what
it is, when that which shines upon our lives, that which we believe can
yield the flowers and fruit we look for, proves nothing but an enormous
deception!--Tell me, what have I done to you that you COULD do anything
so cruel? Child, child, had you but told me it yesterday! Why, why, did
you lie so fearfully?--It must be my fault, mine, who have instructed
you,--have I then forgotten to speak about truth! No,--then where have
you thus learnt it?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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