"I don't know," I said. "Was it these things I was using" (taking up a
pack of cards), "or something like this?" (I held up a book.)
"Yes, that one. What were you doing with it? What's it for?"
"We call it reading a book," and I tried to explain what the idea was,
and read out a few lines; it happened to be _Pickwick_. They were
absorbed. Slim said, half to himself, "Something like a glass," which I
thought quite meaningless at the time. Then I showed them a picture in
another book. That they made out very quickly.
"But when's it going to move on?" said Slim.
"Never," I said. "Ours stop just like that always. Do yours move on?"
"Of course they do; look here." He lay down on the tablecloth and
pressed his forehead on it, but evidently could make nothing of it.
"It's all rough," he said. I gave him a sheet of paper. "That's better;"
and he lay down again in the same posture for a few seconds. Then he got
up and began rubbing the paper all over with the palms of his hands. As
he did so a coloured picture came out pretty quickly, and when it was
finished he drew aside to let me see, and said, somewhat bashfully, "I
don't think I've got it _quite_ right, but I meant it for what happened
the other evening." He had certainly not got it right as far as I was
concerned. It was a view of the window of the house, seen from outside
by moonlight, and there was a back view of a row of figures with their
elbows on the sill. So far, so good; but inside the open window was
standing a figure which was plainly--much too plainly, I thought--meant
for me; far too short and fat, far too red-faced, and with an owlish
expression which I am sure I never wear. This person was now seen to
move his hand--a very poor hand, with only about three fingers--to his
side, and pull, apparently, out of his body, a round object more or less
like a watch (at any rate it was white on one side with black marks, and
yellow on the other) and lay it down in front of him. At this the
figures at the window-sill threw up their arms in all directions and
fell or slid down like so many dolls. Then the picture began to get
fainter, and disappeared from the paper. Slim looked at me expectantly.
"Well," I said, "it's very interesting to see how you do it, but is that
the best likeness of me that you can make?"
"What's wrong with it?" said he. "Isn't it handsome enough or
something?"
I heard Wag throw himself down on the table, and, looking at him, I saw
that he had got both hands pressed over his mouth.
"May I ask what the joke is?" I said rather dryly (for it is surprising
how touchy one can be over one's personal appearance, even at my time of
life). He looked up for an instant at me, and then gasped and hid his
face again. Slim went up to him and kicked him in the ribs.
"Where's your manners?" he said in a loud whisper. Wag rolled over and
sat up, wiping his eyes.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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