India -- History -- 1000-1526 -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Reincarnation -- Fiction
After this, Kota did not appear again in public. Indeed, for the next
two moons she spent her time almost wholly on her bed, attended by
Jensa, and sometimes by Hilka, till, at length, January came. In the
last days, Gokarna suddenly became attentive, nay, almost tender, to
his wife. He was by nature neither demonstrative nor affectionate.
But the matter of his child touched the dominating note of his
nature:—pride. And he could not but be interested in the person who
had power to present him with sons to whom he could hand down his
state and dignity. Gokarna was inordinately anxious for a son. Though
his dispassionate nature rebelled bitterly at the thought, he was
determined that, should this child prove to be a girl, he would take
another wife. Meantime, however, Kota was the object of his highest
interest; and not a little was she astonished when he left the
conducting of the full-moon sacrifices to an under-priest, that he
might stay beside her. He wished to talk with her of the child. But
Kota’s three years of wedded life had not prepared her to confide her
secret thoughts to her husband, and he got surprisingly little from her
on the subject nearest both of them. His conclusion was that she was
like all women:—too stupid to think. But had Kota chosen, she could
have disclosed to him a little wonder-world of motherhood that would
have opened his eyes anew to womankind. Melancholy she had been. Now
she was full of dread. Nevertheless, the sacred love was in her; and,
in her brighter hours, she had given her child all the tenderness of
hope, all the ambitions and desires for its welfare, that her stunted
womanhood could conjure up. For the first years of its life, at least,
the baby would be her own to love and to rule. Her heart would have
something to cling to. The dry dust of her existence was about to
put forth flowers and foliage at last. But of such thoughts, and the
joy in them, she could tell Gokarna nothing, as he sat beside her
mat-bed in mid-January of that year 1207. He could only make ceaseless
inquiries as to her welfare; and, toward nightfall, he was rewarded
by her suddenly sitting up, and crying to him to send at once for the
low-caste nurse who was to attend her in the coming hours.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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