"'First, let me apologize for not entering into new negotiations regarding our present expansion. But due to a severe blight on our stinkweed crop, which as you know is our staple diet, our people are becoming severely malnourished. I'm sure that you are all well aware that we are greatly dependent on the stinkweed plant for many purposes, the least of which is the manufacture of stinkweed pills which we all partake of religiously in order to maintain that rich aroma that permeates our bodies, but which mainly radiates from the area of our feet. As you know, our olfactory senses are virtually nonexistent, but we are aware of a slight essence of this aroma which we find most pleasing. Unfortunately for others who might stray across our borders, the smell overpowers them in seconds, rendering any potential invader helpless. Now, as a result of the factors I have just presented to you, we find your bottom land by our northern borders to be extremely rich in nutrients that the stinkweed plant needs to flourish, and preliminary experimental results indicate that stinkweed plants grown in this environment are completely immune to the blight that is wiping out our crop. Therefore, we have no option but to take as much of your land as will insure the very survival of the proud nation that we are. That is why we did not inform you formally or informally. The matter is simply not negotiable. "'Sincerely "'Stinky McFoot President (Past, Present and Future) of Stinkfootland "'P.S.--It is not our fault that the Sniffer people have such big noses that their sense of smell is ultra sensitive to our presence.'" The little group had fallen silent. "You know," said Elephant to Ozma. "We are greatly sympathetic to their predicament. However, the situation with the Stinkfoots and the Sniffers is diverting us from our real problem--which is that huge, furry, ugly, filthy putrid monstrosity who calls himself a spider." "That's very true," said Ozma. "But remember, we have to negotiate with the Saber-Toothed Light Bulbs before we can do anything. In the meantime, the President of the Sniffer Nation has asked our help and we simply cannot refuse. He and his people are in a real bind." "I'll be in a real bind if that monster attacks me," snapped Elephant. "I'll be bound up in his giant web and devoured to death." "Now don't you worry," Ozma replied, reaching up to pat Elephant's trunk. "We won't let anything happen to you." Her answer must have satisfied Elephant, because he wrapped his trunk around her waist and hoisted her up to his back. Then he walked down to the stream and took a long drink. As they returned to join the group, Hootsey was clearing his throat and proceeded to speak with pure wisdom dripping from every word. "I have been thinking..."