The Forgery; or, Best Intentions.James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
General
The Forgery; or, Best Intentions.
James, G. P. R. (George Payne Rainsford)
Fiction
"Now, like Alexander Selkirk, 'I am monarch of all I survey;' but like
him, too, my dear sir, I lack subjects sadly. Send some one for the
steward, Mrs. Grimes; and, to guard against all the many
contingencies, some of which are always happening in the country, if
the steward should not be at home, let his son come up; if he has no
son, or his son be out, let his wife come; if no wife or son be found,
let a daughter, a nephew, a niece, an uncle, a cousin, or some
relation of some kind; and especially let each, all, or every of them
come directly, for I have an infinity of orders to give; the spirit of
hurry is upon me; and, let the whole inhabitants of the manor and all
their horses work as hard as they will, they will have great
difficulty in doing what I intend to have done, within the time I
shall allow. Now, my dear Mrs. Grimes, don't stand and stare, but send
for the steward, as I tell you. You, Matthews, go and see what is
wanting, as far as you can judge, in the butler's, cook's, and
housekeeper's departments. I know there is plenty of wine in the
cellar, and I can see from the window that there is mutton at the
door."
These last words were addressed to Mr. Hargrave with a slightly
sarcastic smile; and she then added, laughing--
"I intend to sleep here to-morrow night with all my household."
Mr. Hargrave shook his head, saying--
"I scarcely think you will find that possible, considering that not a
single bed in the whole house has been slept in for many years."
"Do you pretend to believe, sir," asked Lady Anne, gravely, "that
anything is impossible when a lady wills it? Let me tell you, it shall
be done. I will make the gamekeepers into house-maids, the shepherds
into scullions, the steward into an upholsterer, and the labourers of
the land into kitchen-maids, laundry-maids, dairy-maids, and
housekeepers. Do you suppose that I, who never was contradicted in my
life, will be so on my first visit to my own castle? But, to tell you
the truth, my dear Mr. Hargrave, I trust more to a whole regiment of
servants of mine, who are coming down from London, and to two tumbrels
of London ammunition, than to all the auxiliaries of Northumberland."
Thus she gaily went on till the steward appeared in haste, with that
half-dogged, half-plausible look which a man puts on when he is
suddenly brought into the presence of authority, which may demand an
account not very easy to be rendered.
He bowed low to Lady Anne, and even lower to Mr. Hargrave; but Lady
Anne attacked him at once about the sheep.
"Whose sheep are those, Mr. Blunt?" she demanded, "and how came they
to be where they are?"
"Why, you see, my lady," said the steward, evading the real point of
her question, "the rest of the park is reserved for the deer, and I
thought your ladyship would not like it to be meddled with."
But Lady Anne was not to be put off; and she demanded,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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