Until a wonderful and illuminating happening in his eleventh year,
little Paul Kegworthy had taken existence with the fatalism of a child.
Of his stepfather, who smelt lustily of sour beer, bad tobacco and
incidentally of other things undetected by Paul's nostrils, and whom he
saw rarely, he dwelt in mortal terror. When he heard of the Devil, at
Sunday school, which he attended, to his stepfather's disgust, he
pictured the Prince of Darkness not as a gentleman, not even as a
picturesque personage with horns and tail, but as Mr. Button. As
regards his mother, he had a confused idea that he was a living blight
on her existence. He was not sorry, because it was not his fault, but
in his childish way he coldly excused her, and, more from a queer
consciousness of blighterdom than from dread of her hand and tongue, he
avoided her as much as possible. In the little Buttons his experience
as scapegoat taught him to take but little interest. From his earliest
memories they were the first to be fed, clothed and bedded; to his own
share fell the exiguous scraps. As they were much younger than himself,
he found no pleasure in their companionship. For society he sought such
of the youth of Budge Street as would admit him into their raucous
fellowship. But, for some reason which his immature mind could not
fathom, he felt a pariah even among his coevals. He could run as fast
as Billy Goodge, the undisputed leader of the gang; he could dribble
the rag football past him any time he desired; once he had sent him
home to his mother with a bleeding nose, and, even in that hour of
triumph, popular sympathy had been with Billy, not with him. It was the
only problem in existence to which his fatalism did not supply the key.
He knew himself to be a better man than Billy Goodge. There was no
doubt about it. At school, where Billy was the woodenest blockhead, he
was top of his class. He knew things about troy weight and geography
and Isaac and the Mariners of England of which Billy did not dream. To
Billy the football news in the Saturday afternoon edition of The
Bludston Herald was a cryptogram; to him it was an open book. He would
stand, acknowledged scholar, at the street corner and read out from the
soiled copy retrieved by Chunky, the newsboy, the enthralling story of
the football day, never stumbling over a syllable, athrill with the joy
of being the umbilicus of a tense world, and, when the recital was
over, he would have the mortification of seeing the throng pass away
from him with the remorselessness of a cloud scudding from the moon.
And he would hear Billy Goodge say exultantly:
"Didn't Aw tell yo' the Wolves hadn't a dog's chance?"
And he would see the admiring gang slap Billy on the back, and hear
"Good owd Billy!" and never a word of thanks to him. Then, knowing
Billy to be a liar, he would tell him so, yelping shrilly, in
Buttonesque vernacular (North and South):
"This morning tha said it was five to one on Sheffield United."
"Listen to Susie!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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