The Foundations (An Extravagant Play) — John Shaqi
The Foundations (An Extravagant Play)Galsworthy, John
General
The Foundations (An Extravagant Play)
Galsworthy, John
English drama
MRS. LEMMY. Don't 'ee du that, Bob. Yu must forgive'im, Ma'am; it's
'is admiration. 'E was always one for the ladies, and he'm not used
to seein' so much of 'em.
LADY W. Don't you think you owe us an explanation?
MRS. LEMMY. Speak up, Bob.
[But LEMMY only shifts his feet.]
My gudeness! 'E've a-lost 'is tongue. I never knu that 'appen to 'e
before.
LORD W. [Trying to break the embarrassment] No ill-feeling, you
know, Lemmy.
[But LEMMY still only rolls his eyes.]
LADY W. Don't you think it was rather--inconsiderate of you?
LEMMY. Muvver, tyke me aht, I'm feelin' fynte!
[Spurts of the Marseillaise and the mutter of the crowd have
been coming nearer; and suddenly a knocking is heard. POULDER
and JAMES appear between the pillars.]
POULDER. The populace, me Lord!
LADY W. What!
LORD W. Where've you put 'em, Poulder?
POULDER. They've put theirselves in the portico, me Lord.
LORD W. [Suddenly wiping his brow] Phew! I say, this is awful,
Nell! Two speeches in one evening. Nothing else for it, I suppose.
Open the window, Poulder!
POULDER. [Crossing to the window] We are prepared for any
sacrifice, me Lord.
[He opens the window.]
PRESS. [Writing furiously] "Lady William stood like a statue at
bay."
LORD W. Got one of those lozenges on you, Nell?
[But LADY WILLIAM has almost nothing on her.]
LEMMY. [Producing a paper from his pocket] 'Ave one o' my gum
drops?
[He passes it to LORD WILLIAM.]
LORD W. [Unable to refuse, takes a large, flat gum drop from the
paper, and looks at it in embarrassment.] Ah! thanks! Thanks
awfully!
[LEMMY turns to LITTLE AIDA, and puts a gum drop in her mouth.
A burst of murmurs from the crowd.]
JAMES. [Towering above the wine cooler] If they get saucy, me Lord,
I can always give 'em their own back.
LORD W. Steady, James; steady!
[He puts the gum drop absently in his mouth, and turns up to the
open window.]
VOICE. [Outside] 'Ere they are--the bally plutocrats.
[Voices in chorus: "Bread! Bread!"]
LORD W. Poulder, go and tell the chef to send out anything there is
in the house--nicely, as if it came from nowhere in particular.
POULDER. Very good, me Lord. [Sotto voce] Any wine? If I might
suggest--German--'ock?
LORD W. What you like.
POULDER. Very good, me Lord. [He goes.]
LORD W. I say, dash it, Nell, my teeth are stuck! [He works his
finger in his mouth.]
LADY W. Take it out, darling.
LORD W. [Taking out the gum drop and looking at it] What the deuce
did I put it in for?
PRESS. ['Writing] "With inimitable coolness Lord William prepared
to address the crowd."
[Voices in chorea: "Bread! Bread!"]
LORD W. Stand by to prompt, old girl. Now for it. This ghastly gum
drop!
[LORD WILLIAM takes it from his agitated hand, and flips it
through the window.]
VOICE. Dahn with the aristo----[Chokes.]
LADY W. Oh! Bill----oh! It's gone into a mouth!
LORD W. Good God!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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