me and pity me, even though I called myself a fool while doing
it. Often, often I tried to reform and for a week or two would be
real good. Then perhaps I'd see some money, and I'd try to think
of something else. But that money would come to my mind, and I'd
get hot and dizzy thinking about it. Perhaps I'd say, 'I'll just
look at it,' and finally I'd go and take it--and feel so relieved
and spend it. After I left the hospital it seemed to me that I
could never smile again. I cried all night long; I wanted to die.
I could see one girl who thought I was so good and nice, and her
face as she looked at me when I left! Her eyes were wide open,
and her mouth was so stern, and she looked as if she wanted to
speak but she turned around and walked away. One day I woke up
after a restless night at home, and it seemed to me that I had
strength, that something had turned around in my nature, and
since that day I have never even wanted to steal. I haven't had
to try to be good; it came as natural as eating and sleeping."
The sexually under-inhibited are those whose sex control is
deficient. This may be either from over-passionate nature, bad
example, deficient mentality, vanity and desire for good times,
as in certain girls, etc. To discuss these types would be to
write another book, and so I forbear. But this I wish to
emphasize: that neither age, sex protestation of indifference and
control, occupation or social status, alters the fact that the
history of the sex feelings, impulses and struggles is essential
to a knowledge of character. Without detailing sex types, these
are some that are important.
1. The uninhibited impulsive, passionate (the bulk of the
prostitutes).
2. The controlled, passionate. Very common.
3. The frigid. Not so rare as believed.
4. The extremely passionate (nymphomania, satyriasis). Rare.
Always in trouble.
5. The sensualist, a deliberate seeker of sex pleasure, often
indulging in perversion. Common type.
6. The perverted types,--autoerotic (masturbator), homosexual,
masochists, sadists, fetishist, etc. More common than the
ordinary person dreams.
7. The periodic, to whom sex life is incidental to certain
periods and situations. Common among women, less common among
men.
8. The sublimators, whose sexual activity has somehow been
harnessed to other great activities. Fairly frequent among these
who either through choice or necessity are to remain continent.
9. The anhedonic or exhausted. Found in the sensualists and often
reacted to by the formation of religious and ethical codes, which
eliminate sex,--Tolstoy, the hermits, certain Russian sects, etc.
There is under-inhibition of a good kind. There are
generous-hearted people always ready to give of themselves to
anything or anybody that needs help. Often "fooled" by the
unworthy, they resolve to be calm, judicial and selfish, and
then,--their generous social natures over-ride caution, and again
they plunge into kindness and philanthropy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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