The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A NovelYellott, George
General
The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A Novel
Yellott, George
Fiction
"I certainly recognize that nose," said Toney, pointing to an individual
whose face was covered with an impenetrable thicket of black beard,
leaving only two twinkling eyes and his nasal protuberance visible.
"That extraordinary nose belongs to William Wiggins," said the
Professor.
"To Rosebud?"
"No longer Rosebud," said the Professor. "As soon as he came on board
the sailors called him Old Grizzly. He will be known by no other name at
sea, for when the jolly tars are in the nominative case, the designation
they give a man always clings to him. Hereafter we may as well cease to
call him Wiggins, and speak of him as Old Grizzly."
"He must have been at enmity with the barbers for the last four weeks,"
said Toney.
"When he determined to seek his fortune in the auriferous regions of the
far West, he made a solemn vow not to allow a razor to come in contact
with his countenance until he had dug two barrels of gold, which he said
was enough for any one man. So his beard must continue to grow longer
until he gets his two barrels of gold."
"It will be long enough before he gets the gold," said Toney.
"Pun away boldly," said the Professor; "we are now on the water. But
come, let us go below, and look after our goods and chattels."
During the night the ship anchored in the bay; and next morning the
pilot was sent off, and she stood out to sea.
Coming on deck at an early hour in the morning, Toney and the Professor
were watching the silvery spray darting off from the bow, when they
heard a singular sound, as if proceeding from some huge sea-monster
seized with a fit of the colic. Looking along the bulwarks, they beheld
poor Hercules, with outstretched neck and dilated eyes, pouring out
libations to the inexorable god of the seas. And soon, with pallid
cheeks, M. T. Pate appeared, followed by the Long Green Boy, Old
Grizzly, and Moses, who, with many others, silently glided to the side
of the giant, who, as he stood thrusting out his head and neck with
certain indescribable jerks, and towering above his companions, engaged
in similar exercises, resembled some tall and bulky Shanghai rooster,
with all his numerous progeny around him, grievously afflicted with that
terrible visitation of the poultry-yard which hen-wives denominate the
gapes.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account