The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A NovelYellott, George
General
The Funny Philosophers, or Wags and Sweethearts. A Novel
Yellott, George
Fiction
At the hotel in Lima the Professor and his friends found the supercargo
of the ship who had come to hunt up the passengers. The captain had been
in trouble; the crew having mutinied and refused to work because they
were not allowed the privilege of a cruise on shore. The controversy
between the quarter-deck and the forecastle was finally adjusted, and
the crew agreed to go to work on condition of afterwards having one day
of liberty. The supercargo said that they were now on shore in Callao,
and that the vessel would sail on the following morning.
Upon receiving this information, the passengers made preparations to
proceed on foot to Callao; it being impossible to obtain any vehicle on
that day, as everything which had wheels or hoofs had gone to the
bull-fight and had been left behind in the general stampede which
ensued. The Professor inquired for M. T. Pate, but he was not in the
hotel, and from information received, it was supposed that he had
already left the city and proceeded to the port.
Lima, unlike most American cities, is encompassed by a wall. Just beyond
the gate, which opens on the six miles of level road leading to Callao,
are a number of mounds heaped up by the ancient inhabitants of the
country for the purpose of hiding the remains of mortality. But as these
poor pagans were unwilling to leave the world as unadorned as they had
entered it, numerous excavations had been made by their Christian
successors, who had stripped them of their heathenish ornaments, and
carried them off, to be converted into the images of saints.
The Professor and his companions turned aside from the road and
proceeded to an inspection of the place.
Hercules had already thrust his long neck into one of the excavations,
when, with a loud exclamation, he drew suddenly back as if he had
certainly seen a sight. The Long Green Boy now peeped into the
aperture, and, starting back, looked as if he were about to exclaim,
"Angels and ministers of grace, defend us!" But lo! it starts up--it
moves towards them--long, lean, and spectral!--in robes as white as the
driven snow, like the shivering shade of an ancient Inca come hither to
mourn over the extinction of his race.
Hercules assumes the posture of a racer ready to make a desperate
spring, and only waiting for the word "Go!" The Professor throws himself
in the attitude of Hamlet in his interesting interview with the ghost.
Botts clutches the hilt of his bowie-knife and stands prepared to battle
with whatever may come forth. But hold! rash man, forbear! No horrible
apparition of an unbaptized infidel is this, but a pious Christian and a
poor countryman in distress. It is the unfortunate M. T. Pate stalking
forth with no covering except a single shirt.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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