Science fiction; Short stories; Space ships -- Fiction
"That's glory," admitted Hanson dolefully, "but it ain't enough glory
for _them_. I know this outfit, honey. I been working for them, man and
boy, for nigh onto forty years. Their motto is: Get all you can and
then some!
"It ain't going to matter to them that we found our lost First,
discovered anti-grav, and made the first landing on a new planet. No
sirree! They sent us out to find polarium deposits, and if we don't
come home with the best claim--"
Biggs said, "Polarium? Did you say polarium, Cap?"
"That's what I said," groaned the skipper. "Now be a good boy, Lanse.
Go 'way and let me suffer in peace."
"Why," grinned Biggs, "I don't believe there's any reason to suffer,
Captain. Because, you see, that strange new substance I mentioned--the
one out of which I constructed my telekaleidoscope--is polarium! There
are tremendous deposits of it here on Jupiter. Why not? This is the
mother planet of Europa--"
* * * * *
So--there you are! That's Lancelot Biggs for you. Screwball, genius,
wizard and luck-box extraordinary. Toss him in a mud puddle and he'll
come up clutching a diamond every time. Not once in a while. Every time.
And I guess it was just about now that the Old Man slipped me the
high-sign to drag hips out of there.
"Look, Sparks," he suggested, "how about you and me take a little walk
and explore this here new planet?"
I said, "Oh, I'm quite comfortable here, Cap--"
He jabbed an elbow into my ribs ferociously. "Are you coming
peaceable?" he hissed, "or do I have to pull off your leg and beat you
over the head with the bloody stump?"
I got it then. Diane and Biggs. They were eyeing each other like two
marshmallows ready to melt. So I said, "Well, all right, Skipper. If
you want to. 'Bye, folks!"
And do you know--they never even heard me?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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