The Girl on the BoatWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
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The Girl on the Boat
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Children of the rich -- Fiction; Golf stories; Humorous stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
“Well, I hate dogs,” said Eustace Hignett querulously. “I remember
Wilhelmina once getting quite annoyed with me because I refused to step
in and separate a couple of the brutes, absolute strangers to me, who
were fighting in the street. I reminded her that we were all fighters
nowadays, that life itself was in a sense a fight; but she wouldn’t be
reasonable about it. She said that Sir Galahad would have done it like
a shot. I thought not. We have no evidence whatsoever that Sir Galahad
was ever called upon to do anything half as dangerous. And, anyway, he
wore armour. Give me a suit of mail, reaching well down over the
ankles, and I will willingly intervene in a hundred dog fights. But in
thin flannel trousers, no!”
Sam rose. His heart was light. He had never, of course, supposed that
the girl was anything but perfect; but it was nice to find his high
opinion of her corroborated by one who had no reason to exhibit her in
a favourable light. He understood her point of view and sympathised
with it. An idealist, how could she trust herself to Eustace Hignett?
How could she be content with a craven who, instead of scouring the
world in the quest for deeds of derring-do, had fallen down so
lamentably on his first assignment? There was a specious attractiveness
about poor old Eustace which might conceivably win a girl’s heart for a
time; he wrote poetry, talked well, and had a nice singing voice; but,
as a partner for life ... well, he simply wouldn’t do. That was all
there was to it. He simply didn’t add up right. The man a girl like
Wilhelmina Bennett required for a husband was somebody entirely
different ... somebody, felt Samuel Marlowe, much more like Samuel
Marlowe.
Swelled almost to bursting point with these reflections, he went on
deck to join the ante-luncheon promenade. He saw Billie almost at once.
She had put on one of those nice sacky sport-coats which so enhance
feminine charms, and was striding along the deck with the breeze
playing in her vivid hair like the female equivalent of a Viking.
Beside her walked young Mr. Bream Mortimer.
Sam had been feeling a good deal of a fellow already, but at the sight
of her welcoming smile his self-esteem almost caused him to explode.
What magic there is in a girl’s smile! It is the raisin which, dropped
in the yeast of male complacency, induces fermentation.
“Oh, there you are, Mr. Marlowe!”
“Oh, _there_ you are,” said Bream Mortimer with a slightly different
inflection.
“I thought I’d like a breath of fresh air before lunch,” said Sam.
“Oh, Bream!” said the girl.
“Hello?”
“Do be a darling and take this great heavy coat of mine down to my
state-room, will you? I had no idea it was so warm.”
“I’ll carry it,” said Bream.
“Nonsense! I wouldn’t dream of burdening you with it. Trot along and
put it on the berth. It doesn’t matter about folding it up.”
“All right,” said Bream moodily.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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