Ida felt a strange relief to her spirits, despite the absolute blackness
of her domestic horizon, when the carriage drove away from Wimperfield.
She had left the house very seldom of late, feeling that duty chained her
to the joyless scene of home; and there was an infinite relief in turning
her back upon that stately white building in which was embodied all the
misery of her blighted life. No charnel-house could be fuller of ghastly,
unspeakable horrors than Wimperfield had become to her since that long,
never-to-be-forgotten night when she had listened to her husband's
ravings, and when all the loathsome objects his distracted fancy had
conjured into being, and his never-resting tongue had described, had been
only a little less real to her mind than they had been to his. Could she
ever again know peace and rest in those rooms; ever tread those corridors
without shuddering and dread, ever know happiness again in all the days
of her life? She leaned back in the carriage as they drove along the
avenue, and rested with half-closed eyes, her soul heavy within her, her
body weighed down by the soreness and weariness of her mind. If life
could but end now! She felt that she could be of no more use in the
world. She could do nothing to help her wretched husband. He had chosen
to go his own way to destruction, and he was too near the edge of the pit
now to be snatched back by any friendly hand. She felt that his fate had
passed beyond the regions of hope. God might pity the self-destroyer, and
deal lightly with him at the great audit; but on this earth there was no
hope of cure. Brian Wendover was going down to the pit.
Bessie sat by Ida's side tenderly watching her worn white face, while
Lady Palliser was entirely absorbed by the delight of administering
fussily to her boy, who was well enough to laugh her shawls and
comforters and motherly precautions to scorn, and to jump about in the
carriage, as at each break in the wood some new object of interest caught
his eye--a rabbit, a squirrel, a hawk high up in the blue, invisible to
any gaze less eager than his own. He was in wild spirits at being out of
doors again, a restless eager soul, not to be restrained by any medical
ordinances or maternal anxieties.
They went for a long drive, the horses, very fresh after the little
exercise of the last month, devouring the ground under them--the summer
breeze brisk and inspiring--the country beautiful beyond measure--an
ever-varying landscape of hill and wood and valley, green pastures and
golden grain.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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