Gambling -- Fiction; Political fiction; Science fiction, American; Short stories
"May get that third star after all," he told his wife that night. "And
not too long to wait, maybe."
But, above all, the month was filled with clamor from Ireland. Her
Majesty's Government in Whitehall had immediately issued a communique
which took a glacial view of the "puerile" proposal to toss for Northern
Ireland. It was the timing of this communique, rather than its contents,
that proved a tactical error. It had come too quickly, and Irishmen,
both north and south, resented it.
As a Belfast newspaper wrote tartly: "Irishmen on both sides of the line
are quite able to decide such matters for themselves, without the
motherly interference of London."
Dublin agreed in principle to toss, but the wrangling over conditions
and exceptions boiled up into the greatest inter-Irish quarreling of
twenty years. It was still raging when General O'Reilly flew into the
Vale of Kashmir with a broad smile and the Golden Judge.
Again the great coin glittered high in the air while none other than
Nehru himself called out, tensely: "Heads!"
It fell "Tails."
"So be it!" Nehru said calmly, shaking hands with the Governor-General
of Pakistan.
"Well, general," Nehru said, turning to O'Reilly with a smile, "are you
satisfied now? I think we've proved we're a sporting people. So have the
Chinese, and the Jews and the Arabs. But what about your own folk, the
Irish? From what I read, their sporting qualities seem to be highly
overrated. I'd say they'd never gamble but on a sure thing."
The general's face went red at the insult, and so, a day later, did the
collective face of all Irishmen, North and South. For a while there was
aghast silence from the Emerald Isle, a silence sullen and embarrassed.
And then a great rumbling roar of indignation.
"Mr. Speaker!" cried a member of the Dail in Dublin. "Are the Irish
people, who honor great gamblers only a little less than great poets,
to be outdone by dark-skinned heathen? Mr. Speaker, I say _no_!"
The following morning, the government of Eire formally offered to toss
for the Six Lost Counties and, if the coin fell contrary, to say no more
about them forever. Belfast agreed that same afternoon, and the whole
island went wild with excitement. Hardly any Irishman failed to place
some kind of side bet on the outcome, and stakes were laid that day that
would be spoken of with prideful awe for generations to come.
The remark of a Limerick drayman was widely quoted. "There's not a man
of us here," he commented in the course of a game of darts at the Sword
and Shamrock, "but would toss a coin for his grandmother's head, and
well ye know it. So after all the blatherin' and yowrin', why not have a
go for the Six Counties, and let the coin decide it now and foriver,
once and for all, win or lose?"
The British Government surrendered with grace, and offered to play host
to the toss in London, as a neutral place. They soon learned, with
burning ears, that the last place on earth any Irishman considered
neutral was London.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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