British -- India -- Fiction; India -- History -- British occupation, 1765-1947 -- Fiction
"By the Lord, you are hitting back harder than I deserve," he
reproached her desperately. "At least you might believe of me all that
I said of Desmond, . . that it is for your sake, and that I shall hate
letting you go. The suggestion was entirely his own. He asked me to
tell you, from him, that you would be doing them both a very real
kindness by going with Mrs Desmond; and I thought . . you would be glad
of a chance to help either of them; especially since you must know,
after all I said at Kajiar, that it is impossible . . yet for us to
start fair and square."
It was a long speech for Eldred, and it brought her down from the stars.
"Naturally I am delighted to do anything on earth for the Desmonds,"
she said sweetly, ignoring his final remark. "You speak as if I might
refuse to go. But I haven't fallen quite so low as that."
"Quita, have you _no_ mercy on a man?" he flashed out between anger and
pain. "There has never been any question of 'falling' on your side,
and you know it. But surely you understand that, in spite of all that
has happened between, what I dared not to do a month ago, I dare not do
now."
"Do you mean . . is . . the trouble not any less?"
"No."
"But I thought you were going . . to fight it?"
"So I am; so I shall, till I break it, or it breaks me. But look back
over the past few weeks, and ask yourself if I have had much of a
chance so far."
She unclasped her hands and looked up at him, speech hovering in her
eyes. But she dropped them again, and stood so, with bowed head,
shifting her rings nervously up and down her slim third finger.
"Dear lass, what's troubling you?" he asked. "We've got to understand
one another to-night; so don't be afraid to speak out. Better make a
clean wound and have done with it, than think hard things of me that
may be unjust. Tell me the thought I saw in your eyes."
"I was thinking of something Michael said." She spoke in an even voice
without looking up.
"Michael? Well . . what was it?" Anxiety sharpened his tone.
"He said that if . . if you really . . wanted me back again, your
conscientious scruples would be swept away like straws before a flood.
I wouldn't believe him then. But now . . I'm afraid it's true."
"Confound the man! What does he know about my scruples?" Lenox broke
out with irrepressible vehemence; and she looked up quickly.
"Please don't be violent, Eldred. You told me to speak out. Besides,
Michael is my brother."
"I'm sorry. But if he were ten times your brother, I'd say the same.
He had no business to try and set you against me like that." He caught
her unresisting hands now, and held them fast.
"You take Michael's word against mine . . is that so?" he asked, a dull
flush rising in his face; and he tried to look into her eyes. But she
would not have it.
"Oh, my dear, can't you see it's not," she said, so low that he
scarcely heard her. "It's . . your own actions, contradicting your own
words, that make me feel he must be right."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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