British -- India -- Fiction; India -- History -- British occupation, 1765-1947 -- Fiction
For a while he permitted himself the bitter-sweet satisfaction of
merely watching her where she sat, in a shaft of sunlight, that struck
golden gleams through the burnished abundance of her hair; of noting
the grace and dignity of her pose, and speculating as to the nature of
her thoughts. His wife's reckless impulse on that fateful September
day was bringing him now within measurable distance of a very human
danger. The deep, passionate heart of him, crushed and stifled during
the past five years, was in no safe state to be brought into contact
with a lighted match. But of this danger he was, by his very nature,
sublimely unaware.
Finally he took the short pipe from his lips and spoke.
"Of course you know I have something definite to say, or I should
hardly have the cheek to inflict myself on you twice in the twenty-four
hours."
She looked up and smiled. "You're evidently in one of your bad moods,
or you would not vex me by putting it like that."
"Sorry to vex you, but I _am_ in a bad mood; have been for the last
week; so you must make allowances, I can't sleep, and a restless devil
inside me won't let me settle to steady work. Nerves, I suppose. I
don't look a likely subject, do I? But they give me a deal of trouble
at times; and I came to say that I must go back on my arrangement with
you and Desmond and clear out of this before the end of the week."
"Oh, but surely that would be a great pity; a great disappointment to
us both. Is it really a case of 'must'?"
"I think so."
"And you have only been here a fortnight! Isn't it rather early days
to give in?"
"Very early days--as the case must appear to you; and the evil of it is
that I have no power to make things clearer. Think me an overwrought
fool; a broken-backed corn-stalk, if you choose. It will hurt, of
course; but it can't be helped."
He spoke with undisguised bitterness, and, laying down her work, she
looked at him straightly, a great compassion in her eyes.
"You misunderstand the fundamentals of friendship if you can talk like
that," she said gently. "It is rooted in reticence in respect for
another's individuality. Whatever you choose to do, you may be very
sure that I shall neither doubt your good reasons, nor seek to know
them. That is my idea of what it means to be a friend."
"I stand rebuked," he answered gravely, "and I'm not likely to forget
what you have said."
"At the same time," she added in a lighter tone, "one is only human!
And I can't let you leave Dalhousie without a word of protest--even if
it is useless." She hesitated. "May I speak straight?"
"As straight as you please. I should prefer it."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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