In the moment of its delivery, however, the strange lady next me had
turned quickly and looked me in the face. She appeared to me an
utterly colourless person, _fade_, thin, dowdy, with hardly a sign of
spirit or expression--a condemned ghost of womanhood. I wondered
presently at the fond attentions with which her husband treated her,
at his efforts to win a smile from her unresponsive face, and his
patience when habitually baffled, since he himself was a fine bold
figure of a man, white-teethed, black-whiskered, for all his
forty-five or so years. And I wondered still when I came to learn how
persistently she had disappointed his hopes of an heir, the few
children she had born to him having died one by one on the very
threshold of their existence. But perhaps all those fruitless pangs
were accountable as much for his manly devotion as for her
insensibility. She might have held him responsible for that seed of
death which had stultified all the rich Woman in her. In any case,
that he was more attached to her than she to him was obvious.
She spoke little--nothing to me; and, I noticed, ate little, but
crumbled her bread all dinner-time. I was not concerned, inasmuch as
it gave me the opportunity to observe elsewhere, which I had the
inclination, and the provocation now, moreover, to do. Though the
object of the old ex-governor’s misbegotten attention, and the
immediate brief cynosure of all eyes, I was the only one, I think, not
momentarily confounded. A curious self-possession, a sort of conceit
of masterfulness, had come to claim me of late. A kind of cold and
scrutinising philosophy had found me out of the old dependence. Having
had long the will to counter my allotted destiny, a very little of the
means had encouraged me to something like effrontery. I felt already a
sense of power; a truculence in the face of the least supposed
imposition on me of superiority.
While, therefore, they were all looking at me, I was coolly intent on
Lady Skene. One hurried glance my way she gave; and then her eyes were
lowered to the cloth, as she drew off her gloves and addressed some
commonplace remark to Mr Dalston, who sat on her right. Her voice, I
have not yet observed, was marked by a slight Cockney
intonation--hardly to be gathered from its softness--just a twang from
Cheapside, like the faintest distant whine of Bow Bells. But it was
enough to imply her origin.
Looking away from her, my eyes travelled to Mr Pugsley beside me. He
was obviously flustered and annoyed--shifted his shoulders, pinched
his nose, defied, self-conscious, my stare, and failed utterly to
stand up to it. Then he cleared his throat with violence, and
affected, ostentatiously, to prefer the menu card to my company.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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