Produced by David Widger THE GROCERY MAN AND PECK'S BAD BOY. Peck's Bad Boy and His Pa, No. 2 By George W. Peck 1883 [Illustration: Cover] [Illustration: frontispiece] [Illustration: titlepage] CONTENTS. CHAPTER I. VARIEGATED DOGS--THE BAD BOY SLEEPS ON THE ROOF--A MAN DOESN'T KNOW EVERYTHING AT FORTY-EIGHT--THE OLD MAN WANTS SOME POLLYNURIOUS WATER--THE DYER'S DOGS--PROCESSION OF THE DOGS--PINK, BLUE, GREEN AND WHITE--“WELL, I'M DEM'd”--HIS PA DON'T APPRECIATE. CHAPTER II. HIS PA PLAYS JOKES--A MAN SHOULDN'T GET MAD AT A JOKE--THE MAGIC BOUQUET--THE GROCERY MAN TAKES A TURN--HIS PA TRIES THE BOUQUET AT CHURCH--ONE FOR THE OLD MAID--A FIGHT ENSUES--THE BAD BOY THREATENS THE GROCERY man--A COMPROMISE. CHAPTER III. HIS PA STABBED--THE GROCERY MAN SETS A TRAP IN VAIN--A BOOM IN LINIMENT--HIS PA GOES TO THE LANGTRY SHOW--THE BAD BOY TURNS BURGLAR--THE OLD MAN STABBED--HIS ACCOUNT OF THE FRAY--A GOOD SINGLE HANDED LIAR. CHAPTER IV. HIS PA BUSTED--THE CRAZE FOR MINING STOCK--WHAT'S A BILK?--THE PIOUS BILK--THE OLD MAN INVESTS--THE DEACONS AND EVEN THE HIRED GIRLS INVEST--HOT MAPLE SYRUP FOR ONE--GETTING A MAN'S MIND OFF HIS TROUBLES. CHAPTER V. HIS PA AND DYNAMITE--THE OLD MAN SELLING SILVER STOCK--FENIAN SCARE--“DYNAMITE” IN MILWAUKEE--THE FENIAN BOOM--“GREAT GOD, MANNER! WE ARE BLOWED UP!”--HIS MA HAS LOTS OF SAND--THE OLD MAN USELESS IN TROUBLE--THE DOG AND THE FALSE TEETH CHAPTER VI. HIS PA AN ORANGEMAN--THE GROCERY MAN SHAMEFULLY ABUSED--HE GETS HOT--BUTTER, OLEOMARGARINE AND AXLE GREASE--THE OLD MAN WEARS ORANGE ON ST. PATRICK'S DAY--HE HAS TO RUN FOR HIS LIFE--THE BAD BOY AT SUNDAY SCHOOL--INGERSOLL AND BEECHER VOTED OUT--MARY HAD A LAMB CHAPTER VII. HIS MA DECEIVES HIM--THE BAD BOY IN SEARCH OF SAFFRON--“WELL, IT'S A GIRL, IF YOU MUST KNOW”--THE BAD BOY IS GRIEVED AT HIS MA'S DECEPTION-- “SH-H-H TOOTSY GO TO SLEEP”--“BY LOW, BABY”--THAT SETTLED IT WITH THE CAT--A BABY! BAH! IT MAKES ME TIRED CHAPTER VIII. THE BABY AND THE GOAT. THE BAD BOY THINKS HIS SISTER WILL BE A FIRE ENGINE--“OLD NUMBER TWO”--BABY REQUIRES GOAT MILK--? THE GOAT IS FRISKY--TAKES TO EATING ROMAN CANDLES--THE OLD MAN, THE HIRED GIRL, AND THE GOAT--THE BAD BOY BECOMES TELLER IN A LIVERY STABLE CHAPTER IX. A FUNERAL PROCESSION--THE BAD BOY ON CRUTCHES--“YOU OUGHT TO SEE THE MINISTER”--AN ELEVEN DOLLAR FUNERAL--THE MINISTER TAKES THE LINES--AN EARTHQUAKE--AFTER THE EARTHQUAKE WAS OVER--THE POLICEMAN FANS THE MINISTER--A MINISTER SHOULD HAVE SENSE CHAPTER X. THE OLD MAN MAKES A SPEECH. THE GROCERY MAN AND THE BAD BOY HAVE A FUSS--THE BOHEMIAN BAND--THE BAD BOY ORGANIZES A SERENADE--“BABY MINE”--THE OLD MAN ELOQUENT--THE BOHEMIANS CREATE A FAMINE--THE Y. M. C. A. ANNOUNCEMENT CHAPTER XI.