Great Britain. Royal Navy -- Fiction; Seafaring life -- Fiction
He threw his arm round her, and, with a tremendous air of
proprietorship, almost dragged her indoors. Little gasps of excitement
were her show of protest. As they passed through the room below the
man could be heard speaking quick words to her, in a voice unevenly
controlled; speaking with strange disregard for the public room’s
bleak emptiness and for the nearness of those who were sleeping, for
the stare of electric bulbs, which, when they shine singly over places
deserted till the morning, have so intent an air of watchfulness and
curiosity.
II
On Saturday evening Margaret and Mrs. Fane-Herbert reached the hotel.
After dinner, Mrs. Fane-Herbert said to John:
“I hear you changed your mind about leaving the Navy.”
“It was scarcely a question of my changing my mind. It didn’t get as
far as that. You see----” He looked aside and saw that Margaret was
watching him. “At any rate, I am settled down to it now,” he said.
Hugh broke in with talk of Kamakura.
“When does your leave end?” Margaret asked.
“Monday.”
“You must go back to your ship, then?”
“Yes, by noon.”
She turned to John. “And you, too?”
Something in her intonation caught his attention, and he looked swiftly
at her.
“Yes,” he said. “You must send us news of London as our share in your
home-coming.... I want to hear of your great-grandmother’s welcome.”
“Her great-grandmother?” Mrs. Fane-Herbert put in.
“The portrait, mother--the one over the stairs.” Then to John: “She’ll
give me comments with her welcome, a lecture for her runaway.”
There was a hint of bitterness in that; but John’s remembering that
conversation on the first evening she had known him stung her with
the sting--half-pleasant, half-painful--of childhood days recalled in
dark moments. For now she was easily stung to sorrow or to a kind of
fierce joy. She had wanted desperately to talk, to tell someone how
free she was--Ordith being gone. Untold, her freedom seemed incomplete.
But neither her father nor her mother had spoken. They had learnt the
facts, accepted them; she had attempted no explanation; not one word
had been said. This silence had a hardening quality. Her experience,
the vivid remembrance of which might have flowed easily away, was
somehow frozen in her mind, like a sin unconfessed. There was no one to
whom she could go. Warmth of heart, comradeship, the simplest affection
she starved for. But this being left alone, this frigidness of spirit,
this intolerable independence....
John had known, at least, that her heart was full. It was as if she
had seen a friendly face in the midst of a vast unnoticing crowd. When
she said good-night to him she gave him her hand with new confidence.
Then, out of his sight, she was suddenly angry with herself as for a
foolishness, a weakness for the first time realized. An instant she
stood unmoving outside her bedroom door--her mind tripped somehow,
taken unawares.
And in the morning she settled at once to a book, glad of an occupation
so isolating.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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