Great Britain. Royal Navy -- Fiction; Seafaring life -- Fiction
For a time, while she was in church, her trouble had been less. The
air of security, of permanence, of prosperity about the place, and the
absence of any kind of tumult within it had lulled and comforted. “The
peace of God which passeth all understanding....” She had bowed her
head with the rest, mistaking the decorous silence for peace indeed.
But, as she rose from her knees, her eyes encountered Ordith’s which
seemed half-laughingly to search and accuse her; and, as if following
a suggestion of his, she began to think that the support she had
received from the service had been based, not upon faith, but upon the
extraordinary beauty of its prose. The hymns, with their redundancies
and bad rhymes, had meant nothing to her, despite their devotion,
and to the modern prayers on contemporary subjects she had given no
heed. The balance and completeness of the Litany, the Lessons’ direct
beauty, the Collects’ vigorous restraint--upon these her attention had
been concentrated. Though the matter of the Benediction had remained
unchanged, it would have brought no comfort to her if it had been
expressed differently--by the Archbishops, for example.
“Hadn’t old man Cranmer a wonderful ear for words?” Ordith said
lightly, cutting Margaret to the quick. She felt that he read her
thoughts, or--and this with a pang of fear that was reflected in the
eyes she suddenly raised--that he had imposed his thoughts upon her.
“You don’t like my saying that?” he asked, looking into her face. And
even as she moved her lips to reply, to express somehow the resentment
that was burning in her, his power asserted itself and drove her back
to say, scarcely of her own will:
“Yes; it’s quite true.”
Like a pleasing, habitual vice, Ordith frightened and controlled
her. Her father had chosen him as her husband, and her mother seemed
to acquiesce in the choice. She pictured herself saying “No” to
Ordith, and “No” to her father and mother. She would be very calm,
very determined, and then all would be over, the battle fought and
won. Surely it would be easy to say “No.” One word to be spoken, one
definite resolve to be kept--that was all. Nowadays coercion was
impossible; the time of starvation, and imprisonment, and whips was
long past. What she had to do was to look Ordith in the face, say “No,”
and stand by her decision. It sounded easy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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