Laugh like a boy at splendors that have sped, To vanished joys be blind and deaf and dumb; My judgments seal the dead past with its dead, But never bind a moment yet to come. Though deep in mire, wring not your hands and weep; I lend an arm to all who say: “I can.” No shamefaced outcast ever sank so deep But he might rise and be again a man. —Walter Malone. [Illustration: _A Graduate of the University of Chicago, 1916_] THE MAN WHO WINS. The man who wins is the average man, Not built on any particular plan, Not blessed with any particular luck, Just steady and earnest, and full of pluck. When asked a question he does not guess; He answers the question, “No,” or “Yes.” When set to a task that the rest can’t do He buckles down till he’s put it through. Three things he’s learned: That the man who tries Finds favor in his employer’s eyes; That it pays to know more than one thing well; That it doesn’t pay all he knows to tell. For the man who wins is the man who works, Who neither labor nor trouble shirks, Who uses his hand, his head, his eyes. The man who wins is the man who tries. [Illustration: If It’s Funny—Laugh!] A BROTHERHOOD. “Would you advise me to get married?” “I can’t give you any advice on that subject, my boy.” “You married men are all alike. None of you will give a fellow any advice.” “Well, marriage is a secret society.”—Louisville Courier-Journal. THE USUAL CONVERSATION. Father—What did you and John talk about last night, dear? Daughter—Oh, we talked about our kith and kin. Small Brother—Yeth, pop, I heard ’em. He seth, “Kin I hev a kith?” and she seth, “Yeth, you kin!”—Yale Record. WHY IT WAS SAFER. A boy was visiting another boy, and as they were going to bed the little host knelt to say his prayers. “I never say my prayers when I am home,” said the visitor. “That’s all right,” said the other boy. “You better say them here. This is a folding bed.” EASY. “Did that book agent succeed in inveigling you into buying a set of Shakespeare’s works?” “No.” “How did you get rid of him so easily?” “I simply showed him the last dun I received for a set of books I bought on the installment plan two years ago.”—Birmingham Age-Herald. GOT ’EM THE FIRST TIME. “Mr. Johnson,” asked the professor in the freshman class, “what three words are used most among the college students?” “I don’t know,” said the student. “Correct,” replied the professor. HIS DUTIES DEFINED. Boss—“I wanted to speak to you, Mr. Lovum, about your attentions to Miss Sweetthynge during office hours. I hired you as a billing clerk only—no cooing mentioned. That will be all for the present.” THE SUPREME TEST. “Brudder Jackson,” said the colored preacher to a parishioner, “yo’ wife done tell me she got religion and wants to jine de church.” “Yas, suh, dat’s so,” replied the husband.