With clenched hands he abruptly departed. The cords of his neck were
swollen and rigid; there was a haze before his eyes. He went up to the
refuge of his daughter's room. She was lying still, breathing thickly,
with a finger print of scarlet on each cheek.
She was so thin, so wasted, the bed and room so stripped of every
comfort, that he dropped forward on his knees, his arms outflung across
her body in an inarticulate prayer for faith, for strength and patience.
It was not much he wanted--only food for one child and help for a woman,
and a grip on the devil tearing at him in the form of hatred.
He got only a temporary relief, for when he went down Bella and June
Bowman were whispering together; he passed the door with his silent
tread and saw their heads close. Bella was actually pretty.
An astonishing possibility occurred to him--perhaps Bella would go away
with Bowman. An unbidden deep relief at such a prospect invaded him; how
happy he could be with Flavilla. They would get a smaller house, which
Flavilla would soon learn to keep for him; they would go to church and
prayer meeting together, her soprano voice and his bass joined in the
praise of the Lord, of the Almighty who raised the dead and his Son, who
took the thief to glory.
This speculation was overcome by a troubled mind; both his innate pride
in his wife as an institution of his honor, the feeling that he would
uphold it at any cost, and his Christianity interrupted the vision of
release. He must not let her stumble, and he would see that June Bowman
didn't interfere in his home. More beer made its appearance, and the
other man grew louder, boastful. He exhibited the roll of money--that
was nothing, four times that much could be had from the same source. He
was a spender, too, and treated all his friends liberally. Lemuel was
to see if there was any wine in the damned jumping-off place; and when
would they all go to Atlantic?
“Never,” Doret repeated.
Bowman laughed skeptically.
The rage stirred and increased, blinding Lemuel Doret's heart, stinging
his eyes. Bella, watching him, became quieter, and she gave June--she
called him June--a warning pressure of her fingers. Her husband saw it
with indifference; everything small was lost in the hot tide enveloping
him. His hands twitched, but there was no other outward sign of his
tumult. He smoked his cigarettes with extreme deliberation.
It was evening again, and they were sitting on the narrow porch. The
west was a serene lake of fading light against which the trees made dark
blots of foliage. Nantbrook seemed unreal, a place of thin shadow, the
future unsubstantial as well; only the past was actual in Lemuel Doret's
mind--the gray cold prison, the city at night, locked rooms filled with
smoke and lurid lights, avaricious voices in the mechanical sentences of
gambling, agonized tones begging for a shot, just a shot, of an addicted
drug, a girl crying.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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