The Harlequinade: An ExcursionCalthrop, Dion Clayton
General
The Harlequinade: An Excursion
Calthrop, Dion Clayton
Literature
[Such a man of the world! But when you can dress in vermilion and
purple and gold and wear the biggest cloak and the largest sword that
ever was and twist your moustache as outrageously as you please, what's
easier than to fascinate such a child as Columbine? She curtseys to him
as he bows to her. She beckons to her husband to join them. But he,
lost now in the landscape, now in his reopened book, waves only a
distant greeting, and will not budge. The Man of the World smiles a
most worldly smile, and soon he and pretty Columbine are strolling
towards the house; she looking down at the flagged walk and the flowers
that border it, he looking down at her, with eyes too greedy to be
kind.
What a pity, isn't it?
[Then the music tells us quite unmistakably that Pantaloon and Clown
are tumbling along.
Listen! Pantaloon and Clown! They are always coming to lunch. Because if
actors like this know there is lunch ...
UNCLE EDWARD. Hush!
[And on they tumble; the Pantaloon and Clown that Children know! Clown
has a basket that he slyly sets down and Pantaloon falls over it, of
course. Gelsomino joins them, willy-nilly; for they fetch him there,
because Clown has a joke to tell.
ALICE. This is the beehive and butterfly-hive story. The music does bees
and butterflies beautifully, doesn't it? And I told you the joke besides,
so it's quite easy to follow. Gelsomino never sees it. He is dull.
[Clown does sigh deeply over Gelsomino's unmoved face. But he tries
again. He takes from his basket the entirely impossible corpse of a
cat. Pantaloon chuckles silently. But Alice laughs out loud.
Oh! I'd forgotten that one. It's one of his very old ones ... but I like
it. He says ... "Somebody's thrown away this perfectly good cat." Gelsomino
doesn't think it a bit funny.
[Gelsomino doesn't. He sniffs and retires disgusted. Clown juggles with
the cat to cheer himself up. Then he flings it recklessly high in air
and you hear it fall (the big drum does this) with a loud plomp in the
road.
Back stroll Columbine and the Man of the World. But she is looking up
at him now, and the music tells us that her heart is beating fast. She
welcomes Clown and Pantaloon with a kiss, one for each. Clown is so funny
when he is kissed. And she makes them known to the Man of the World. Clown
is so funny when he bows. He can't bow all he wants to without knocking
Pantaloon over. Then Columbine has to help pick him up and comfort him and
kiss him again. Then there is the meal to be prepared. Off they run, all
three, and on they bring it, drinkables, eatables, table and chairs.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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