You know how to make a baby cry? Hold his hands. It's the most basic
thing there is. What they did to us so we couldn't kill each other, it
was like being tied up, like having our hands held so we couldn't get
free. Well. But two years was long enough. Too long.
The bartender came over and said, "Pal, I'm sorry. See, I turned the
air-conditioning down. You all right? You look so--"
I said, "Sure, I'm all right."
He sounded worried. I hadn't even heard him come back. The girl was
looking worried, too, I guess because I was shaking so hard I was
spilling my drink. I put some money on the table without even counting
it.
"It's all right," I said. "We were just going."
"We were?" She looked confused. But she came along with me. They always
do, once they find out you've been to Mars.
* * * * *
In the next place, she said, between trips to the powder room, "It must
take a lot of courage to sign up for something like that. Were you
scientifically inclined in school? Don't you have to know an awful lot
to be a space-flyer? Did you ever see any of those little monkey
characters they say live on Mars? I read an article about how they lived
in little cities of pup-tents or something like that--only they didn't
make them, they grew them. Funny! Ever see those? That trip must have
been a real drag, I bet. What is it, nine months? You couldn't have a
baby! Excuse me-- Say, tell me. All that time, how'd you--well, manage
things? I mean didn't you ever have to go to the you-know or anything?"
"We managed," I said.
She giggled, and that reminded her, so she went to the powder room
again. I thought about getting up and leaving while she was gone, but
what was the use of that? I'd only pick up somebody else.
It was nearly midnight. A couple of minutes wouldn't hurt. I reached in
my pocket for the little box of pills they give us--it isn't refillable,
but we get a new prescription in the mail every month, along with the
pension check. The label on the box said:
CAUTION
_Use only as directed by physician. Not to be taken by persons
suffering heart condition, digestive upset or circulatory disease.
Not to be used in conjunction with alcoholic beverages._
I took three of them. I don't like to start them before midnight, but
anyway I stopped shaking.
I closed my eyes, and then I was on the ship again. The noise in the bar
became the noise of the rockets and the air washers and the sludge
sluicers. I began to sweat, although this place was air-conditioned,
too.
I could hear Wally whistling to himself the way he did, the sound
muffled by his oxygen mask and drowned in the rocket noise, but still
perfectly audible. The tune was _Sophisticated Lady_. Sometimes it was
_Easy to Love_ and sometimes _Chasing Shadows_, but mostly
_Sophisticated Lady_. He was from Juilliard.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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