A queer, hectic, unsatisfying life it must be, Rachael thought, saying
good-bye to her guest a day or two later. Dressing, rouging, lacing,
pinning on her outrageously expensive hats, jerking on her extravagant
white gloves, drinking, rushing, screaming with laughter, screaming
with anger, Billy was one of that large class of women that the big
city breeds, and that cannot live elsewhere than in the big city. She
would ride in a thousand taxicabs, worrying as she watched the metre;
she would drink a thousand glasses of champagne, wondering anxiously if
Joe were to pay for it; she would gossip of a dozen successful
actresses without the self-control to work for one-tenth of their
success, and she would move through all the life of the theatres and
hotels without ever having her place among them, and her share of their
little glory. And almost as reckless in action as she was in speech,
she would cling to the brink of the conventions, never quite a good
woman, never quite anything else, a fond and loyal if a foolish and
selfish mother, some day noisily informing her admirers that she
actually had a boy in college, and enjoying their flattering disbelief.
And so would disappear the last of the handsome fortune that poor
Clarence's father had bequeathed to him, and Clarence's grandson must
fight his way with no better start than his grandfather had had
financially, and with an infinitely less useful brain and less reliable
pair of hands. Billy might be widowed or freed in some less
unexceptionable way, and then Billy would marry again, and it would be
a queer marriage; Rachael could read her fate in her character.
She wondered, walking slowly the short mile that lay between her house
and the station, when Billy was gone, just how a discerning eye might
read her own fate in her own character. Just what did the confused
mixture of good motives and bad motives, erratic unselfishnesses and
even more erratic weaknesses that was Rachael, deserve of Fate? She had
bought some knowledge, but it had been dearly bought; she had bought
some goodness, but at what a cost of pain!
"I don't believe that Warren ever did one-tenth the silly things we
suspected him of!" Alice exclaimed one day. "I believe he was just an
utter fool, and Magsie took advantage of it!"
Rachael did not answer, but there was no brightening of her sombre
look. Her eyes, grave and sad, held for Alice no hope that she had
come, as George and Alice had come, to a softer view of Warren's
offence.
"I see him always as he was that last horrible morning," she said to
Alice. "And I pray that I will never look upon his face again!" And
when presently Alice hinted that George was receiving an occasional
letter from Warren, Rachael turned pale.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account