The Historical Child: Paidology; The Science of the ChildChrisman, Oscar
History
The Historical Child: Paidology; The Science of the Child
Chrisman, Oscar
Children; Manners and customs
=Women and Marriage.= In the early times in India, women were not
excluded as they were later, but they were honored and respected. They
were considered as the intellectual companion of the husband, as helper
in the daily life, and as partaker in the religious duties. They
attended the courts and assemblies and public entertainments, being
permitted to appear freely and openly on public occasions. The change
took place when they were conquered by the Moslems, from whom the custom
of the exclusion of women was learned by the Hindus or was thrust upon
them.
The Code of Manu some three centuries before Christ set the status of
woman thus, "During her childhood a woman depends on her father; during
her youth, on her husband; her husband being dead, on her sons; if she
has no sons, on the near relatives of her husband; or if in default of
them, on those of her father; if she has no paternal relatives, on the
sovereign. A woman ought never to have her own way." So it is no wonder
that the wife was treated by the husband in the harshest manner and she
to respond with the greatest humility. The following from a witness of a
hundred or more years ago, portrays some of the relations which women
bore to the opposite sex:
"The women, on the other hand, are so thoroughly accustomed to harsh and
domineering treatment from their husbands that they would be quite
annoyed if the husbands adopted a more familiar tone. I once knew a
native lady who complained bitterly that her husband sometimes affected
to be devoted to her in public and allowed himself such little
familiarities as are looked upon by us as marks of affection. 'Such
behavior,' said she, 'covers me with shame and confusion. I dare not
show myself anywhere. Did anyone ever see such bad manners amongst
people of our caste? Has he become a Feringhi (European), and does he
take me for one of their vile women?'
"As a rule a husband addresses his wife in terms which show how little
he thinks of her. _Servant_, _slave_, etc., and other equal flattering
appellations, fall quite naturally from his lips.
"A woman, on the other hand, never addresses her husband except in terms
of the greatest humility. She speaks to him as _my master_, _my lord_,
and even sometimes _my god_. In her awe of him she does not venture to
call him by his name; and should she forget herself in this way in a
moment of anger, she would be thought a very low class of person, and
would lay herself open to personal chastisement from her offended
spouse. She must be just as particular in speaking of him to anyone
else; indeed, the Hindus are very careful never to put a woman under the
necessity of mentioning her husband by name. If by chance a European,
who is unacquainted with this point of etiquette, obliges her to do so,
he will see her blush and hide her face behind her _sari_ and turn away
without answering, smiling at the same time with contemptuous pity at
such ignorance.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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