English fiction -- 20th century; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
"Six up," I pointed out to Henry, "and three bisques left. They're
jolly little things, bisques, but you want to use them quickly.
Bisque dat qui cito dat. Doesn't the sea look ripping to-day?"
"Go on," growled Henry.
"I once did a two at this hole," I said as I teed my ball. "If I did
a two now and took a bisque, you'd have to do it in nothing in order
to win. A solemn thought."
At this hole you have to drive over a chasm in the cliffs. My ball
made a bee line for the beach, bounced on a rock, and disappeared
into a cave. Henry's "Pink Spot," which really seemed to have a
chance of winning a hole at last, found the wind too much for it and
followed me below.
"I'm in this cave," I said when we had found Henry's ball; and with
a lighted match in one hand and a niblick in the other I went in and
tried to persuade the "Ostrich" to come out. My eighth argument was
too much for it, and we re-appeared in the daylight together.
"How many?" I asked Henry.
"Six," he said, as he hit the top of the cliff once more, and shot
back on to the beach.
I left him and chivied my ball round to where the cliffs are lowest;
then I got it gradually on to a little mound of sand (very delicate
work this), took a terrific swing and fairly heaved it on to the
grass. Two more strokes put me on to the green in twenty. I lit a
pipe and waited for Henry to finish his game of rackets.
"I've played twenty-five," he shouted.
"Then you'll want some of my bisques," I said. "I can lend you three
till Monday."
Henry had one more rally and then picked his ball up. I had won
seven holes and I had three bisques with which to win the match. I
was a little doubtful if I could do this, but Henry settled the
question by misjudging yet again the breadth of the stream. What is
experience if it teaches us nothing? Henry must really try to
enlarge his mind about rivers.
"Dormy nine," I said at the tenth tee, "and no bisques left."
"Thank Heaven for that," sighed Henry.
"But I have only to halve one hole out of nine," I pointed out.
"Technically I am on what is known as velvet."
"Oh, shut up and drive."
I am a bad golfer, but even bad golfers do holes in bogey now and
then. In the ordinary way I was pretty certain to halve one of the
nine holes with Henry, and so win the match. Both the eleventh and
the seventeenth, for instance, are favourites of mine. Had I halved
one of those, he would have admitted cheerfully that I had played
good golf and beaten him fairly. But as things happened--
What happened, put quite briefly, was this. Bogey for the tenth is
four. I hooked my drive off the tee and down a little gully to the
left, put a good iron shot into a bunker on the right, and than ran
down a hundred-yard putt with a niblick for a three. One of those
difficult down-hill putts.
"Luck!" said Henry, as soon as he could speak.
"I've been missing those lately," I said.
"Your match," said Henry; "I can't play against luck like that."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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