English fiction -- 20th century; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
The temptation was too much for a conscience already sodden with
billiards, drink and cigars. He flung a leg over the sill and drew
himself gently into the room. At least he would have one good meal,
he too would have his Christmas dinner before the end came. He
switched the light on and turned eagerly to the table. His eyes
ravenously scanned the contents. Turkey, mince-pies, plum-pudding--
all was there as in the days of his youth.
[EDITOR. THIS IS BETTER. I ORDERED A TURKEY, I REMEMBER. WHAT ABOUT
THE MISTLETOE AND HOLLY? I RATHER THINK I ASKED FOR SOME OF THEM.
AUTHOR. WE MUST LET THE READERS TAKE SOMETHING FOR GRANTED
EDITOR. I AM NOT SO SURE. COULDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THIS:
"HOLLY AND MISTLETOE HUNG IN FESTOONS UPON THE WALL?"]
Indeed, even holly and mistletoe hung in festoons upon the wall.
[EDITOR. THANK YOU.]
With a sigh of content Hardrow flung himself into a chair, and
seized a knife and fork. Soon a plate liberally heaped with good
things was before him. Greedily he set to work, with the appetite of
a man who had not tasted food for several hours....
"Dood-evening," said a voice. "Are you Father Kwistmas?"
Robert turned suddenly, and gazed in amazement at the white-robed
figure in the doorway.
"Elsie," he murmured huskily.
[EDITOR. HOW DID HE KNOW? AND WHY "HUSKILY"?
AUTHOR. HE DIDN'T KNOW, HE GUESSED. AND HIS MOUTH WAS FULL.]
"Are you Father Kwistmas?" repeated Elsie.
Robert felt at his chin, and thanked Heaven again that he had let
his beard grow. Almost mechanically he decided to wear the mask--in
short, to dissemble.
"Yes, my dear," he said. "I just looked in to know what you would
like me to bring you."
"You're late, aren't oo? Oughtn't oo to have come this morning?"
[EDITOR. THIS IS SPLENDID. THIS QUITE RECONCILES ME TO THE ABSENCE
OF THE ROBIN. BUT WHAT WAS ELSIE DOING DOWNSTAIRS?
AUTHOR. I AM MAKING ROBERT ASK HER THAT QUESTION DIRECTLY.
EDITOR. YES, BUT JUST TELL ME NOW--BETWEEN FRIENDS.
AUTHOR. SHE HAD LEFT HER GOLLIWOG IN THE ROOM, AND COULDN'T SLEEP
WITHOUT HER.
EDITOR. I KNEW THAT WAS IT.]
"If I'm late, dear," said Robert, with a smile, "why, so are you."
The good food and wine in his veins were doing their work, and a
pleasant warmth was stealing over Hardrow. He found to his surprise
that airy banter still came easy to him.
"To what," he continued lightly, "do I owe the honour of this
meeting?"
"I came downstairs for my dolly," said Elsie. "The one you sent me
this morning, do you remember?"
"Of course I do, my dear."
"And what have you bwought me now, Father Kwistmas?"
Robert started. If he was to play the role successfully he must find
something to give her now. The remains of the turkey, a pair of
finger-bowls, his old hat--all these came hastily into his mind, and
were dismissed. He had nothing of value on him. All had been pawned
long ago.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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