English fiction -- 20th century; Humorous stories, English; Short stories, English
However, by taking one step to the north and another to the
south-west, he found himself close enough. A short but painful walk,
with his boots in his hand, brought him to his destination. He had a
moment's natural hesitation about making a first call at the castle
in his stockinged feet, but consoled himself with the thought that
in life-and-death matters one cannot bother about little points of
etiquette, and that, anyhow, the giant would not be able to see him.
Then, donning the magic cloak, and with the magic sword in his hand,
he entered the castle gates. For an instant his heart seemed to stop
beating, but the thought of the Princess gave him new courage....
The Giant was sitting in front of the fire, his great spiked club
between his knees. At Charming's entry he turned round, gave a start
of surprise, bent forward eagerly a moment, and then leant back
chuckling. Like most overgrown men he was naturally kind-hearted and
had a simple humour, but he could be stubborn when he liked. The
original affair of the tortoise seems to have shown him both at his
best and at his worst.
"Why do you walk like that?" he said pleasantly to Charming. "The
baby is not asleep."
Charming stopped short.
"You see me?" he cried furiously.
"Of course I do! Really, you mustn't expect to come into a house
without anything on your feet and not be a LITTLE noticeable. Even
in a crowd I should have picked you out."
"That miserable dwarf," said Charming savagely, "swore solemnly to
me that beneath this cloak I was invisible to the eyes of my
enemies!"
"But then we AREN'T enemies," smiled the Giant sweetly. "I like you
immensely. There's something about you--directly you came in ... I
think it must be love at first sight."
"So that's how he tricked me!"
"Oh, no, it wasn't really like that. The fact is you are invisible
BENEATH that cloak, only--you'll excuse my pointing it out--there
are such funny bits of you that aren't beneath the cloak. You've no
idea how odd you look; just a head and two legs, and a couple of
arms.... Waists," he murmured to himself, "are not being worn this
year."
But Charming had had enough of talk. Gripping his sword firmly, he
threw aside his useless cloak, dashed forward, and with a beautiful
lunge pricked his enemy in the ankle.
"Victory!" he cried, waving his magic sword above his head. "Thus is
Beauty's brother delivered!"
The Giant stared at him for a full minute. Then he put his hands to
his sides and fell back shaking in his chair.
"Her brother!" he roared. "Well, of all the--Her BROTHER!" He
rolled on the floor in a paroxysm of mirth. "Her brother! Oh,
you--You'll kill me! Her b-b-b-b-brother! Her b-b-b-b--her b-b-b
--her b-b--"
The world suddenly seemed very cold to Charming. He turned the ring
on his finger.
"Well?" said the dwarf.
"I want," said Charming curtly, "to be back at home, riding through
the streets on my cream palfrey, amidst the cheers of the
populace.... At once."
. . . . . . .
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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