I suppose that what I observe in myself must be observed by some other
men of similar character in _themselves_; therefore I am emboldened to
mention, that, when I travel, I never arrive at a place but I immediately
want to go away from it. Before I had finished my supper of broiled fowl
and mulled port, I had impressed upon the waiter in detail my
arrangements for departure in the morning. Breakfast and bill at eight.
Fly at nine. Two horses, or, if needful, even four.
Tired though I was, the night appeared about a week long. In cases of
nightmare, I thought of Angela, and felt more depressed than ever by the
reflection that I was on the shortest road to Gretna Green. What had _I_
to do with Gretna Green? I was not going _that_ way to the Devil, but by
the American route, I remarked in my bitterness.
In the morning I found that it was snowing still, that it had snowed all
night, and that I was snowed up. Nothing could get out of that spot on
the moor, or could come at it, until the road had been cut out by
labourers from the market-town. When they might cut their way to the
Holly-Tree nobody could tell me.
It was now Christmas-eve. I should have had a dismal Christmas-time of
it anywhere, and consequently that did not so much matter; still, being
snowed up was like dying of frost, a thing I had not bargained for. I
felt very lonely. Yet I could no more have proposed to the landlord and
landlady to admit me to their society (though I should have liked it--very
much) than I could have asked them to present me with a piece of plate.
Here my great secret, the real bashfulness of my character, is to be
observed. Like most bashful men, I judge of other people as if they were
bashful too. Besides being far too shamefaced to make the proposal
myself, I really had a delicate misgiving that it would be in the last
degree disconcerting to them.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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