_Hinc illae lacrimae!_ The subject is concerned over the impression he makes upon the physician. He wants to know whether the physician has sympathy for him, whether he is impressed or indifferent. He is afraid of making himself appear ridiculous. The physician becomes the chief person around whom his own life interests are being centered for the time. “But that is irrelevant. You want to get well; and that has nothing to do with personal matters.” “To be sure,—that is just what I was saying to myself. Doctor, you are my last hope. And yet, I am already losing patience and feel like running off. It is less than two weeks since I went to purchase a revolver intending to shoot myself. The plan fell through only on account of my lack of adroitness. I was unable to procure a revolver. The saleslady demanded to be shown a purchase permit and I did not have one. There must have also been a tremor in my voice. I was so excited.... If I had been able to procure that revolver I would not be now sitting in your office.” “Why did you want to die?” “A life full of trouble! No friends! No prospect of improvement! The everlasting depression!” “And did you not think of the suffering you would have caused your mother? To your mother who sacrificed her life for you?” “No, I was indifferent about that. It would have only served her right, because it is she who has ruined my life. It might have been the end of her too.... But I was truly sorry for my friend. He has so many cares and so much to think about. It would have shaken him up. He is a writer and is now at work on a new novel. It would have certainly thrown him out of the writing mood and it would have interfered with his creative activity.” “What has your mother done you that you should want to punish her so severely?” This brings out the last repressed grudge against the mother who came near separating him from his much beloved friend.