forth: he runs after an old woman with his erect membrum (the child is a
symbol for the genitalia. _Cp._, in this connection, _The Language of
Dreams_, _Dreams and Sex_, Chapter, “Children in Dreams,” translation by
_James S. Van Teslaar_, Badger, Gorham Press, Boston, 1922).
He is not a little surprised that his dreams portray heterosexual
feelings. Heretofore he had paid no attention to his dreams.
I have not yet stated whom the old woman represents. He is asked to
mention any woman that occurs to him and after some hesitation he
states: my mother.
Here we come across one of the roots of his homosexuality, one that
perhaps we anticipated. But thus far I avoided any inquiries about his
attitude towards the mother.
What is the meaning of that portion of the dream which portrays a number
of tin dishes? I perceive this as follows: He does not possess many
treasures, it is all mere tin, but such as it is it all belongs to the
woman above ... the mother. The neighbor warns the mother that another
woman might rob her of her son’s affection. The mother is very vain and
spends considerable time preparing her toilette.
The key to the dream rests in the pollution with which it ends and the
deepest effect: the disgust on account of the dirty, unclean hands of
the woman above.
We see that the pollution is slowly prepared. First there is a
representation of the heterosexual love (Tristan). But his inner
voices—the public—express themselves against that love, the latter is
deprecated: there is whistling and shouting and ironic applause. Next
the father is upon the scene of action. He is represented in the act of
leaving. Other women appear,—the old woman, the neighbor. But the orgasm
is achieved only through the “woman above” (“upstairs,”—_Frau da oben_,
literally, woman above),—the mother. This form of pollution, which at
bottom represents merely an unconscious onanism (unclean hands!) brings
on a feeling of disgust in him.
The next dream portrays a scene in which a man talks about his son. The
scene takes place in a lavatory. Probably this reproduces an infantile
scene wherein he may have observed his father at the lavatory. The dream
following that is much clearer. I reproduce here both:
_I found myself in a lavatory compartment and I watched my “victim.” The
man turned his back to me and spoke to himself about his son. I noticed
that the woman guardian was keeping watch on me from the outside and I
started to leave, grabbing my hat just as she was opening the door to
catch me at my observation post. I acted as if I were unconcerned,
quietly picked up my handkerchief on which I had knelt down, picked off
the floor the various things of mine that were still strewn about,
gloves, muffler, etc., and went off with the feeling that through my
cool behavior I disarmed the woman of her suspicions and had avoided a
public scandal...._
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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