The feeling-attitude in question dates in fact from the earliest
childhood. As yet we are ignorant of child nature and we do not fully
appreciate that the fundamental traits of life show themselves very
definitely during early childhood. This boy must have conceived early
the thought: _I must not be like the father!_ and so he turned away from
women because the father was an admirer of that sex. Whether this choice
of attitude was also influenced directly by love for the father I am
unable to assert in that particular case. It seems to play a
contributory rôle and greatly denied love may enhance the child’s
attachment to the mother. _But does not the example of a drinking
“woman-chaser” contrasted to the picture of a quiet suffering mother
seem to be enough to induce the differentiation and to maintain it as
its underlying determining motive?_ Back of the homosexuality of the
first case of the kind analyzed by _Sadger_ stands the subject’s fear of
becoming like his father. The violent fancies disclosed in the course of
the analysis show that there are also other reasons for the subject’s
fear of woman. He is so constituted that he cannot see blood. This
peculiarity denotes the conversion of a craving for violence and
signifies a repressed sadism.
In Russia he once witnessed how a man split his wife’s head open with a
stone.... The occurrence so impressed him that he could never get it out
of his mind, and he also likes to dwell on wars and other bloody scenes.
There can be no doubt the man is a sadist and that with reference to
women in particular. He has full reason to fear woman. His fear is fear
of himself. He must turn to man, towards whom he does not feel the
instinctive sexual hatred which makes heterosexual excitations
impossible for him. When he has intercourse with a woman, he feels
subsequently a tremendous disgust and revulsion, the whole thing seems
to him unnatural. In the end he gives up all such attempts.
Obviously he is all the time seeking a kindly preeminent father for he
falls in love with an elderly philosopher, out of respect for
philosophy, as he paralogizes, because he looks to philosophy to redeem
him from his suffering. The differentiation is an attempt at gaining
freedom, a tendency to overcome the nature of the father. The love of
the philosopher is a substitution for the love of the father.
Thus we see the importance of the early life history of every subject
for the understanding of homosexuality. The constellation of childhood
permits the reading of the horoscope for the future. Perhaps this
uncontrovertible truth contains the root of all astrologic art, “the
planetary laws governing the facts of life.” The father as the sun, the
mother as the milder moon and the children, the stars. Our fate arranges
itself in accordance with the constellation of these planets. Blind
accident and innate forces cooperate to create man as he is.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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