Here note, if humourists by trade On waistcoat had the shoe displayed, Lampoon's sour spirit might be laid, And cease its spiteful railing. Whether the humour chanced to be Joke, pun, quaint ballad, repartee, Slang, or bad spelling, we should see Good humour still prevailing. And oh! if Equity, as well As Nisi Prius, would not sell _Reason's perfection_ ever To wrangling suitors _sans_ horse-shoe, Lawyers would soon have nought to do, Their subtle efforts ceasing too, Reason from right to sever. While Meux the symbol wears, _tant mieux_, Repelling sinful aid to brew His liquid strains XX; Still, I advise, strong drinks beware, No horse-shoe thwarts the devil there, Or demon-mischief checks. And let me rede you, Mr. Barry, Not all your arms of John, Dick, Harry, Plantagenet, or Tudor; Nor your projections, or your niches, Affluent of crowns and sculptile riches, Will scare the foul intruder. He'll care not for your harp a whistle, Nor lion, horse, rose, shamrock, thistle, Horn'd head, or _Honi soit_; Nor puppy-griffs, though doubtless meant Young senators to represent, Like Samson, armed with jaw. Only consult your sober senses, And ponder well the consequences, If in some moment evil, The old sinner should take Speaker's chair, Make Black Rod fetch the nobles there, And with them play the devil! Then do not fail, great architect, Assembled wisdom to protect From Satan's visitation. With horse-shoe fortify each gate, Each lion's paw; and then the State Is safe from ruination. [Illustration] [Illustration] POSTSCRIPT. The courteous reader's indulgence will, it is hoped, extend to a waiver of all proofs and vouchers in demonstration of the authenticity of this tale, which is "simply told as it was told to me." Any one who can show that it is not the true tale, will greatly oblige, if he can and will a tale unfold, that _is_ the true one. If this is not the true story and history of the horse-shoe's charm against the wicked one, what _is_? That's the question.