He interrupted her in Italian, giving a quick gesture of dissent. "Say
not so, _cara mia_, they would look ill on--on Englishmen. And listen,
child! You should not speak to strangers; and I would rather you did
not speak to such natives at all. They--cannot understand--quite--for
they look on women differently from what we do."
Laila's eyes narrowed sullenly. "Very well, guardian," she said
resignedly, "only I suppose they must know what their women are really
like--and--perhaps the native ladies prefer it."
The old man looked at her, startled, but said nothing.
When he had gone to find Akbar Khân and the carriage, Vincent Dering,
seeing her alone, came up--so, at least, he told himself--out of sheer
politeness, to ask if she wanted anything. Yet something in her face
sent him beyond mere courtesy at once; something almost childishly
apparent.
"I'm afraid you haven't been enjoying yourself," he said kindly. "Why
not? I thought it rather pleasant."
"Very pleasant!" she assented wearily. "Only my guardian has been
telling me not to do things; and I don't know why, but I always want to
do them at once--don't you?"
He could not actually deny the fact. "Sometimes. One has to
pretend--"
She raised her eyes to his blindingly; he caught a glimpse in them of
the lawless approval Roshan Khân had seen, yet of something else--a
lawless disdain. "Why must one?" she asked. "I never mean to, never! If
I want to do a thing I'll do it. I don't mean wicked things, of
course--" she returned here to demure, almost plaintive piety--"I don't
want to do them, and nothing can be wrong when it seems right to you,
and it is real--ever so real, and you give yourself to it, every bit of
you, without thinking, and--and--ask nothing--nothing at all--"
Her vehemence, her passionate assertion, roused a quick response in
him. "Would you do that?" he asked, his voice vibrating. "Would
you--really?"
She smiled slowly. "Of course I don't know," she said, "I haven't tried
yet; but I never pretend. I don't even pretend to like my dress for the
ball. It _is_ so stupid."
He felt annoyed at being led into a burst of emotion, and then baulked.
"You will look charming, I'm sure," he said in his worst manner. "And
if you don't like it, change to something jolly after supper. Lots of
people do."
"Will Mrs. Smith?" she asked quickly.
He flushed angrily. "I really don't know," he began. Her eyes were on
him curiously.
"That's funny," she said. "I thought people--not that it matters," she
went on, "for I can't. I haven't a dress. Do you know I never have
anything I really like--never."
The girl's voice was absolutely touching in its listless, dull
confidence, and he could not help consolation. "You'll have the ball,
I'm sure; you will enjoy it awfully, and--and you mustn't forget that
you've given me the second waltz, and the first extra after supper."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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