The next day was Sunday, and there would be no work, and no chance to
solve the problem, which had become an actual annoyance to me; but I did
not intend that this problem should continue to annoy me and interfere
with my work. I am open and aboveboard myself, and if my secretary did
not choose to be open and aboveboard, and behave like an ordinary human
being, she should depart, and I would tell Walkirk to get me an ordinary
human being, capable of writing from dictation, or depart himself. If he
could not provide me with a suitable secretary, he was not the efficient
man of business that he claimed to be. As to the absurdity of dictating
to a mystery in a barrow bonnet, I would have no more of it.
I do not consider myself an ill-tempered person, and my grandmother
asserts that I have a very good temper indeed; but I must admit that on
Monday morning I felt a little cross, and when Sister Sarah and the nun
entered my antechamber I bade them a very cold good-morning, and allowed
the former to go without attempting any conversation whatever. The nun
having arrived, I would not send her away; but when the sub-mother came
at noon, I intended to inform her that I did not any longer desire the
services of the writing sister, and if she wished to know why I should
tell her plainly. I would not say that I would as soon dictate to an
inanimate tree-stump, but I would express that idea in as courteous
terms as possible.
For fifteen minutes I let the nun sit and wait. If her principles
forbade idleness, I was glad to have a crack at her principles. Then I
began to dictate steadily and severely. I found that the dismissal from
my mind of all conjectures regarding the personality of my secretary was
of great service to me, and I was able to compose much faster than she
could write.
It was about half past ten, I think, and the morning was warm and
pleasant, when there gently sailed into the secretary's room, through
the open window, a wasp. I saw him come in, and I do not think I ever
beheld a more agreeable or benignant insect. His large eyes were filled
with the light of a fatherly graciousness. His semi-detached body seemed
to quiver with a helpful impulse, and his long hind legs hung down
beneath him as though they were outstretched to assist, befriend, or
succor. With wings waving blessings and a buzz of cheery greeting, he
sailed around the room, now dipping here, now there, and then circling
higher, tapping the ceiling with his genial back.
The moment the nun saw the wasp, a most decided thrill ran down the back
of her shawl. Then it pervaded her bonnet, and finally the whole of her.
As the beneficent insect sailed down near the table, she abruptly sprang
to her feet and pushed back her chair. I advanced to the grating, but
what could I do? Seeing me there, and doubtless with the desire
immediately to assure me of his kindly intentions, my friend Vespa made
a swoop directly at the front of the nun's bonnet.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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