New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Psychological fiction; Single women -- Fiction; Social classes -- Fiction
A blush of surprise rose to Lily’s pale face, but before she could
interrupt him he had continued eagerly: “Well, I’ll lend you the
money to pay Trenor; and I won’t—I—see here, don’t take me up
till I’ve finished. What I mean is, it’ll be a plain business
arrangement, such as one man would make with another. Now, what
have you got to say against that?”
Lily’s blush deepened to a glow in which humiliation and gratitude
were mingled; and both sentiments revealed themselves in the
unexpected gentleness of her reply.
“Only this: that it is exactly what Gus Trenor proposed; and that
I can never again be sure of understanding the plainest business
arrangement.” Then, realizing that this answer contained a germ
of injustice, she added, even more kindly: “Not that I don’t
appreciate your kindness—that I’m not grateful for it. But a
business arrangement between us would in any case be impossible,
because I shall have no security to give when my debt to Gus Trenor
has been paid.”
Rosedale received this statement in silence: he seemed to feel the
note of finality in her voice, yet to be unable to accept it as
closing the question between them.
In the silence Lily had a clear perception of what was passing
through his mind. Whatever perplexity he felt as to the
inexorableness of her course—however little he penetrated its
motive—she saw that it unmistakably tended to strengthen her hold
over him. It was as though the sense in her of unexplained scruples
and resistances had the same attraction as the delicacy of feature,
the fastidiousness of manner, which gave her an external rarity,
an air of being impossible to match. As he advanced in social
experience this uniqueness had acquired a greater value for him,
as though he were a collector who had learned to distinguish minor
differences of design and quality in some long-coveted object.
Lily, perceiving all this, understood that he would marry her
at once, on the sole condition of a reconciliation with Mrs.
Dorset; and the temptation was the less easy to put aside because,
little by little, circumstances were breaking down her dislike
for Rosedale. The dislike, indeed, still subsisted; but it was
penetrated here and there by the perception of mitigating qualities
in him: of a certain gross kindliness, a rather helpless fidelity
of sentiment, which seemed to be struggling through the hard
surface of his material ambitions.
Reading his dismissal in her eyes, he held out his hand with a
gesture which conveyed something of this inarticulate conflict.
“If you’d only let me, I’d set you up over them all—I’d put you
where you could wipe your feet on ’em!” he declared; and it touched
her oddly to see that his new passion had not altered his old
standard of values.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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