"At last the end came. He had got me into a corner. Escape was
impossible. My back was against the wall, and in front of me towered the
wretch, his hands on my shoulders, his poisoned breath blowing into my
face. Now, remember, before you blame me for what followed, that I was
perfectly desperate. As I glanced frantically around, hoping against
hope to find some way out of my awful situation, my eyes fell upon a
hat-pin, which lay on a table by my side, well within reach of my right
hand. It was sticking in my hat, which I had carelessly thrown down
there when I came in from dinner a few hours before. It may be that its
design, which was that of a dagger, suggested my putting it to the use I
did. I don't know. At any rate, I seized it, and managed to get it in
between me and my assailant, with its sharp point pressing against his
chest. By this time I had become convinced that the man was simply
intoxicated, and, hoping to frighten him, I cried: 'Let me go. If you
don't, I will kill you.' Yes, I said that; I acknowledge it. But I had
no real intention of doing such a thing. I didn't even dream that I held
in my hand a weapon. What happened then I don't quite know. Whether
he tripped over something, or whether he was so drunk that he lost his
balance, I can't tell. At all events, he fell heavily against me. If I
had not been braced against the wall he certainly would have knocked me
down. As it was, I was stunned for a minute. Recovering myself, I pushed
him from me with all my strength. He reeled back, staggered a few steps,
and then, to my surprise, fell flat upon the floor. As I stood staring
at him, too frightened still to take advantage of this opportunity
to escape, I heard a queer rattling in his throat. What could be the
matter, I wondered, and what was that sticking out of his shirt, right
over his heart? Could it be my hat-pin? I looked down at my hands; they
were empty. Slowly the truth dawned upon me. I rushed to his side,
looked into his glazing eyes, saw the purple fade from his face, and a
greenish hue creep into its place. As the full horror of my position was
borne in upon me, I thought I should go mad. I seized the pin and tried
to drag it out, actuated by an unreasoning hope that if I could only
extract it from the wound the man might even yet revive. But my hands
must have been paralysed with fear, for, although I tugged and tugged,
I failed to move it. At last, after an especially violent effort, I
succeeded in pulling it out, but unfortunately in doing so the head
broke off. I peered again at the man. Still no sign of life, but I could
not, would not believe the worst. Overcoming my horror of the fellow, I
bent down and shook his arm. I shall never forget the sensation it gave
me to touch him. I could doubt the awful truth no longer: the man was
dead, and I had killed him. Then for a time I lost consciousness.
Unfortunately I am young and strong, and soon revived. When I did so I
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