He was never quite sure of his father; he loved him very dearly, and
thought his soft voice and the quiet, caressing words he used better
than all the music he played in the church. But his father had a dreamy
way of looking over him, or right through him, when some question of
moment was being discussed; of losing himself suddenly in the maze of
his thoughts, and wandering off somewhere where Comethup could not
follow him. So that Comethup often hesitated about giving a confidence
to him, because he feared, in his sensitive little soul, that his
father might not follow it out--whatever it might be--patiently to the
end, as it should be followed; might forget what the all-important
subject was before the tale had half been told. He hesitated now, and
was obliged to confess, sitting up in bed in the moonlight, with his
hands clasped round his linen-covered knees, that his father might not
understand, and might--worst thought of all--look dreamily at him, and
stroke his hair, and say, with a maddening smile: "Yes, yes, my boy.
Of course; just so," and begin to hum an air from some of his beloved
music and straightway forget all else. It was quite certain that it was
impossible for him to tell his father.
Brian, perhaps, had a right to know; Brian had been in the garden with
him, and still believed that the garden held a ghost. But Comethup
shrank more strongly still from the idea of telling his cousin; shook
his head very decidedly in the moonlight when he thought of it. It
may have been purely a matter of instinct, probably was; but in his
childish mind that garden, with its dim shadows and its quaint little
figure whose kiss still seemed hot upon his cheek, was a fairyland into
which he jealously desired to go alone, and in which Brian, in the
imagination, seemed an uncouth figure.
The list of possible sympathizers was narrowing down; there remained
only the captain; and slowly there grew in Comethup's mind the idea
that the captain was, after all, the right person. The boy acted
over to himself a little interview, in which he seemed to know, with
exactitude, what the captain would say and what the captain would do;
was sure of him, so to speak, from the outset. For, in Comethup's mind,
the captain might be abrupt and might be severe; but his rules of
conduct were such that, if followed, a small boy would sleep soundly
in his bed at night, and would not fear the darkness. So he decided to
tell the captain, and, comforted with the thought, fell asleep.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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