Then I first pulled the one which I am proud to say he afterwards repeated to various friends as the best one told on him during the War. I said, “President Wilson is getting along fine now to what he was a few months ago. Do you realize, People, that at one time in our negotiations with Germany that he was 5 Notes behind?” How he did laugh at that! Well, due to him being a good fellow and setting a real example, I had the proudest and most successful night I ever had on the stage. I had lots of Gags on other subjects but the ones on him were the heartiest laughs with him, and so it was on all the other occasions I played for him. He come back Stage at intermission and chatted and shook hands with all. Some time I would like to tell of things he laughed at during the most serious stages of the Great War. Just think there were hundreds of millions of Human Beings interested directly in that terrible War, and yet out of all of them he stands, 5 years after it’s over, as the greatest man connected with it. What he stood for and died for, will be strived after for years. But it will take time for with all our advancement and boasted Civilization, it’s hard to stamp out selfishness and Greed. For after all, Nations are nothing but Individuals, and you can’t stop even Brothers from fighting sometimes. But he helped it along a lot. And what a wonderful cause to have laid down your life for! The World lost a Friend. The Theatre lost its greatest supporter. And I lost the most distinguished Person who ever laughed at my little nonsensical jokes. I looked forward to it every year. Now I have only to look back on it as my greatest memory. A JOB WITH THE JAMES FAMILY [Illustration: I COULD JUST SORTER NONCHALANTLY STEP ON THE BRIDE’S TRAIN.] A JOB WITH THE JAMES FAMILY Mr. Warren Gamaliel Harding. President of these United States and Viceroy of the District of Columbia. Chevy Chase Golf Club, Washington, D. C. My dear Mr. President, I see where Mr. Harvey (I mean Col. or, rather, Ambassador) Harvey is coming back here again. Now I don’t know if it’s a slumming trip or just what it is, as he was here a few days ago. Maybe he forgot something in one of his Speeches and is coming back for an Encore. But in a later Paper I see where he is talking of resigning and not going back. Now, if that is the case, I hereby make this an open letter to you, Mr. President, as an application to take said Mr. Harvey (I mean Editor) Harvey’s place.