It’s now eight thirty and the neighbors can see the light in our house and begin to phone in about it to the Police. Miss Fredericks’ Yarn runs out, and she begins to yawn. Jim, Mary and Bill being younger and less unaccustomed to the revelry, had to be literally carried to their beds. Scandal was running rampant, while my wife was getting them off. That left Bill and I with the two Women. I says, “What will we do, Bill,” and he says, “Oh, I am in for anything.” So I just up and said, “Let’s go down to the barn and look at the Horses.” So out we staggered at 9 o’clock in the night in the heart of Beverly Hills. Bill Hays, a man that is a leader in the Presbyterian Church--but it only shows you when this old Movie Spirit gets in you, you will do anything. I lasso four or five horses and bring them out and show them to Bill, but he is all excited talking to the Ladies. They wanted to take a ride, but I didn’t want to carry this thing too far. So we go back to the house and I finally get them into their Coats and Hats and walk them home. My Wife and I we figure the walk will do them good. So when we come back and get in the house why it’s actually 9:15. So I hope by the aid of Bill to put old Beverley Hills on the map as a Wild Town. Bill says to me, “Will, if the Woman’s Club ever finds this out they will stop your pictures”. I says “That’s a good joke on the Woman’s Club, my Pictures have never started.” I know all the papers will have this so I just want to beat them to it. WHAT WE NEED IS MORE FRED STONES [Illustration: HE STARTED AT FOUR OR FIVE YEARS OF AGE AND HAS WORKED ON NEW STUNTS EVERY DAY OF HIS LIFE.] WHAT WE NEED IS MORE FRED STONES Now I am not going to tell you any jokes today as jokes are not good for you to read every day. You will have to look to the Washington dispatches from Congress for your humor. A Comedian is not supposed to be serious nor to know much. As long as he is silly enough to get laughs, why, people let it go at that. But I claim you have to have a serious streak in you or you can’t see the funny side in the other fellow. Last Sunday night a Young Girl who had made a big hit in the Salvation Army preaching on the Street in New York, decided to go out and give religious Lectures of her own. So on her first appearance I was asked by her to introduce her. She said she would rather have me than a Preacher, or a Politician, or any one else. Well, I could understand being picked in preference to a Politician, as that is one Class us Comedians have it on for public respect, but to be chosen in preference to a Preacher was something new and novel.