The Importance of Being Earnest: A Trivial Comedy for Serious PeopleWilde, Oscar
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The Importance of Being Earnest: A Trivial Comedy for Serious People
Wilde, Oscar
Comedy plays; England -- Drama; Foundlings -- Drama; Identity (Psychology) -- Drama
GWENDOLEN.
Yes, I am quite well aware of the fact. And I often wish that in
public, at any rate, you had been more demonstrative. For me you have
always had an irresistible fascination. Even before I met you I was far
from indifferent to you. [Jack looks at her in amazement.] We live, as
I hope you know, Mr. Worthing, in an age of ideals. The fact is
constantly mentioned in the more expensive monthly magazines, and has
reached the provincial pulpits, I am told; and my ideal has always been
to love some one of the name of Ernest. There is something in that name
that inspires absolute confidence. The moment Algernon first mentioned
to me that he had a friend called Ernest, I knew I was destined to love
you.
JACK.
You really love me, Gwendolen?
GWENDOLEN.
Passionately!
JACK.
Darling! You don’t know how happy you’ve made me.
GWENDOLEN.
My own Ernest!
JACK.
But you don’t really mean to say that you couldn’t love me if my name
wasn’t Ernest?
GWENDOLEN.
But your name is Ernest.
JACK.
Yes, I know it is. But supposing it was something else? Do you mean to
say you couldn’t love me then?
GWENDOLEN.
[Glibly.] Ah! that is clearly a metaphysical speculation, and like most
metaphysical speculations has very little reference at all to the
actual facts of real life, as we know them.
JACK.
Personally, darling, to speak quite candidly, I don’t much care about
the name of Ernest . . . I don’t think the name suits me at all.
GWENDOLEN.
It suits you perfectly. It is a divine name. It has a music of its own.
It produces vibrations.
JACK.
Well, really, Gwendolen, I must say that I think there are lots of
other much nicer names. I think Jack, for instance, a charming name.
GWENDOLEN.
Jack? . . . No, there is very little music in the name Jack, if any at
all, indeed. It does not thrill. It produces absolutely no vibrations .
. . I have known several Jacks, and they all, without exception, were
more than usually plain. Besides, Jack is a notorious domesticity for
John! And I pity any woman who is married to a man called John. She
would probably never be allowed to know the entrancing pleasure of a
single moment’s solitude. The only really safe name is Ernest.
JACK.
Gwendolen, I must get christened at once—I mean we must get married at
once. There is no time to be lost.
GWENDOLEN.
Married, Mr. Worthing?
JACK.
[Astounded.] Well . . . surely. You know that I love you, and you led
me to believe, Miss Fairfax, that you were not absolutely indifferent
to me.
GWENDOLEN.
I adore you. But you haven’t proposed to me yet. Nothing has been said
at all about marriage. The subject has not even been touched on.
JACK.
Well . . . may I propose to you now?
GWENDOLEN.
I think it would be an admirable opportunity. And to spare you any
possible disappointment, Mr. Worthing, I think it only fair to tell you
quite frankly before-hand that I am fully determined to accept you.
JACK.
Gwendolen!
GWENDOLEN.
Yes, Mr. Worthing, what have you got to say to me?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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