THE IMPOSSIBLE PIRATE BY GEORGE O. SMITH [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from Astounding Science-Fiction, December 1946. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] Lieutenant Jeffries blinked at his superior. "I appreciate the compliment," he said dryly. "For which thanks. But what happens if I don't produce?" His superior, Captain Edwards of the Solar Police, smiled vaguely. "I have a dual purpose," he said. "First-off, you need a vacation of sorts. Knowing you as I do, I know that sheer vacation would bring about seventeen kinds of psychoneuroses, some mental aberrations, and possible revolt. However, this job is unattached." "Unattached?" gasped Jeffries. "Uh-huh. You have six months in which to track down, and/or procure evidence which will result in the identification, arrest, and conviction of the man known as Black Morgan, the Pirate." "I ... ah--?" "This is your only order. You will not be called upon to do anything else for six months. If at the end of that time you bring about such evidence, et cetera, you will be promptly promoted. If you do not, we will not hold it against you, for all of us have tried and all of us have failed. I'll not punish a man for failing to do that which I have been unable to do. You're an excellent officer, Jeffries, and you've earned a rest. You are now on unattached duty, and can command anything that your job requires, providing your weekly report to this office justifies the expense." Jeffries smiled weakly. "Frankly, you expect me to fail?" Captain Edwards nodded. "I do. But the junketing around will give you a bit of a rest and the seeking for this character will keep your mind alert. So, Lieutenant Jeffries, go out and catch me Black Morgan, the Pirate!" Jeffries grinned. "And meanwhile I shall also make a landing on the mythical planet Vulcan, locate the Gegenschein, and bring back a covey of Voimaids with their equally mythical pet, the Hydrae." Edwards laughed. "Yup," he said, still chuckling. "Now scat, because I have work to do." Jeffries nodded and saluted genially. "I'm it," he said. Then he turned and left the office. Captain Edwards looked after the leaving officer and nodded paternally. Jeffries was an excellent officer. He was loyal, ambitious, and zealous. Cases assigned to him came in after a reasonable length of time, and they were sealed shut and glued down with all the necessary evidence. Those cases that were not to go to court, complete, were those in which the criminal preferred to shoot it out, and Lieutenant Jeffries was both brave and an excellent shot--as well as being a good strategist. He'd been working too hard, and as Edwards said, a real vacation would have been boring. The will-o'-the-wisp known as Black Morgan, the Pirate, would give him a rest.