The Ingoldsby Legends; or, Mirth and MarvelsIngoldsby, Thomas
General
The Ingoldsby Legends; or, Mirth and Marvels
Ingoldsby, Thomas
English fiction -- 19th century; English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor; Humorous poetry, English
"Bim! bome!" went the bell. The knight groaned audibly; Beatrice
Grey wiped her eye with her little square apron of lace de Malines;
there was a moment's pause,--a moment of intense affliction; she
let it fall,--all but one corner, which remained between her finger
and thumb.--She looked at Sir Guy; drew the thumb and forefinger
of her other hand slowly along its border, till they reached the
opposite extremity. She sobbed aloud: "So kind a lady!" said Beatrice
Grey.--"So excellent a wife!" responded Sir Guy. "So good!" said the
damsel.--"So dear!" said the knight.--"So pious!" said she.--"So
humble!" said he.--"So good to the poor!"--"So capital a manager!"--"So
punctual at matins!"--"Dinner dished to a moment!"--"So devout!"
said Beatrice.--"So fond of me!" said Sir Guy.--"And of Father
Francis!"--"What the devil do you mean by that?" said Sir Guy de
Montgomeri.
The knight and the maiden had rung their antiphonic changes on the fine
qualities of the departing Lady, like the _Strophe_ and _Antistrophe_
of a Greek play. The cardinal virtues once disposed of, her minor
excellences came under review:--She would drown a witch, drink
lambs'-wool at Christmas, beg Dominie Dumps's boys a holiday, and dine
upon sprats on Good Friday!--A low moan from the subject of these
eulogies seemed to intimate that the enumeration of her good deeds was
not altogether lost on her,--that the parting spirit felt and rejoiced
in the testimony.
"She was too good for earth!" continued Sir Guy.
"Ye-ye-yes!" sobbed Beatrice.
"I did not deserve her!" said the knight.
"No-o-o-o!" cried the damsel.
"Not but that I made her an excellent husband, and a kind; but she is
going, and--and--where, or when, or how--shall I get such another?"
"Not in broad England--not in the whole wide world!" responded Beatrice
Grey; "that is, not _just_ such another!"--Her voice still faltered,
but her accents on the whole were more articulate; she dropped the
corner of her apron, and had recourse to her handkerchief; in fact, her
eyes were getting red,--and so was the tip of her nose.
Sir Guy was silent; he gazed for a few moments stedfastly on the face
of his lady. The single word "Another!" fell from his lips like a
distant echo;--it is not often that the viewless nymph repeats more
than is necessary.
"Bim! bome!" went the bell.--Bandy-legged Hubert had been tolling for
half an hour;--he began to grow tired, and St. Peter fidgety.
"Beatrice Grey!" said Sir Guy de Montgomeri, "what's to be done? What's
to become of Montgomeri Hall?--and the buttery,--and the servants? And
what--what's to become of _me_, Beatrice Grey?"--There was pathos in
his tones, and a solemn pause succeeded. "I'll turn monk myself!" said
Sir Guy.
"Monk?" said Beatrice.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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