The Intoxicated Ghost, and other storiesBates, Arlo
Science
The Intoxicated Ghost, and other stories
Bates, Arlo
Short stories, American; United States -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
"And when I run, the wee bit child run; and it scared me worse than
ever when the further I run away from it the closer it was to me, till
at last it had a grab on the tail of my coat; and it clung on, and I
that mad with fear I had no more sense than a hen with its head cut
off and goes throwing itself round about for anger at the thought of
being killed, and not knowing it is dead already. And oh, Louizy, the
scaresomeness of the places I run through a-trying to get rid of that
wee bit thing! It's downright awful to think of the things that can
happen to a dead man while he's alive all the time and forgetful of it
through dreaming!
"So when I'd been going on till mortal man could n't stand it no longer,
let alone a ghost, there I was just forninst the gate of Heaven, not in
the least knowing how I come there or would I get in; and blessed St.
Peter himself on a white stone outside the gate sitting and smiling and
looking friendly so the terror went out of me like a shadow in the sun.
And I scraped my foot, and I went up close to him, standing that way
would I hide the child ahind of me; for sez I to meself: 'What'll I say
to his Reverence and he axes me about the girl?' And St. Peter he sez to
me, mighty polite and condescending: 'Good-morning,' sez he. 'The top of
the morning to your Reverence, and thank ye kindly,' sez I. 'And what'll
be your name?' sez he. 'Tim Calligan, your honor,' sez I, answering as
pert as ever I could; for there was that in his manner of speaking
that made me feel shivery, as if me heart'd been out all night in a
snowstorm. 'It's a decent, respectable body I am, your Reverence,' sez
I, 'though I say it as should n't, having nobody else at hand that would
put in a word for me.' 'And was ye buried in holy ground?' sez he. 'I
was that,' sez I; 'and many's the weary year I've been scraping to do
that,' sez I. 'And what'll that be behind ye?' sez he. And I looked
this way and that way, trying to make as if I did n't know; and at last
I pretended to spy the child, and to be that surprised he could n't
suspect I ever clapped eyes on the wee bit thing before. 'That, your
Reverence,' sez I, 'has the look of a scrap of a girl. Is it one your
Reverence is bringing up?' sez I, being that desperate I was as bold
as a brass kettle. 'And what'll she be doing here?' sez his Reverence,
paying no heed to the impertinence of the question. 'Sure, how'll I know
that?' sez I. 'Will she be coming with you?' sez he. 'Don't she belong
hereabouts?' sez I, trying hard to brazen it out, and feeling my heart
go plump down out of my mouth into my boots, more by token that I was
barefoot the time. 'Will she be coming with you?' sez he again. 'Sorra
a bit,' sez I; 'I just could n't get away from her,' sez I. 'And what
for'll you be trying to get away from her, and her no bigger than a
bee's knee?' sez he, looking at me so hard that I could n't hold up my
face forninst him. 'Well, your Reverence,' sez I, looking down at the
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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